Roses, Parchment, and Apple Pie: Forever Invisible
by 3DarkLove3
Summary: I used to think there was nothing better than the smell of roses, the feel of parchment, and the taste of apple pie. But I found something better than all three: Sirius Black. Too bad I'm Forever Invisible to everyone...especially him. SB/OC JP/LE RL/OC
1. Forever Invisible

**A/N: WHOO! my second SB/OC story! I rather like this one, along with my other. Unlike the other one, tho, i actually have a plot figured out (kinda) instead of making it up as i go along. How awesome!**

**Disclaimer: I am not J.K. Rowling. I only enjoy playing with them when i can.**

**One**

Forever Invisible

_Dear Diary, _

_I'm officially a fifth year! My mum and dad didn't see me off today (shocking), but my brother and sister did; made a huge deal about it right before I got on the train. It was so embarrassing; I don't even have the proper vocabulary to explain how absolutely mortifying it was. And what's even more horrifying is the thought of how they're going to act when I leave for my seventh year. Oh dear Merlin…maybe I can carpool to Kings Cross that year? Besides the fact I'm only two years away from graduating, nothing has changed; I'm still pretty much invisible. The only people who even know I exist in my own house are Remus, Lily, Christine, and Alice. Not even my last roommate knows I exist! How depressing._

_Forever invisible, _

_Alexa Embers_

I sighed heavily and closed my golden covered diary, tucking my quill into my bag. Honestly, I don't think anyone is more invisible than I am; how pathetic is it that one of my roommates doesn't even know I exist?

Sigh.

Glancing out the window, I noticed how the scenery flew past quickly; everything was a blur of colors and shapes and lines and other unidentifiable objects. It was hard to believe that this was the English Countryside; it looked so different when you're heading somewhere ordinary people shouldn't even know exist.

Hm…that sounds very…crazy.

Ah well. It was bound to happen, what with my mom being…well, my _mom. _She's so insane; I've tried to owl an asylum, but I guess the owls scare the patients because I got some kind of restraining order from the one in London a few years back.

Ha. Silly crazy people, the owls will only hurt you if you're tiny and squeak.

Gah. I'm tiny! But I don't squeak, so I should be safe. But I do shriek. Isn't that basically the same thing? Oh no! I'm going to DIE!

…

Ok, I'm overreacting. I'm all good now. Well, as good as I'm ever going to get, I suppose. I was torn away from my overreacting mind when the compartment door slid open and a tall, long-legged girl stepped in, carrying a large bag in one hand. She smiled at me, her brilliantly white teeth slightly blinding.

Oh goodness…what if I went _blind _because one of my friend's smiled at me? That would be mortifying. But not as mortifying as a tearful sister and an overprotective brother saying goodbye to me for my seventh year at Kings Cross.

Shudder. I'd gladly go blind first.

"Hey Lexi, how was your summer?" Christy asked, sitting directly across from me, flashing that blinding smile again. I shrugged indifferently, hiding my diary discreetly. Don't want anyone to find _that. _

"It was alright. How was yours? I heard you went to Spain this year," I replied calmly. Christy nodded vigorously, her Barbie-blond hair bouncing in sync with her head. Her beautifully up-turned blue eyes stared at me, a spark of excitement in them. I took in her 'improved' appearance. Her skin was a darker tan color (tanning booth, I bet), the color a deep caramel that gleamed in the sunlight. Her absurdly long legs were being shown off with the short skirt she wore, along with the yellow strapless shirt that had small ruffles on the hem.

Yes, _ruffles. _

Her D-cup breasts were being supported with what I could only guess was a wonder-bra and her eyelids were glossed with a thin layer of orange eye-shadow, a little smoky in the corners. Her mother was a master at make-up, so, naturally, she would get this talent.

Ha, **of course. **

I fidgeted slightly in my seat, picking at an invisible piece of lint on my faded jeans. I read the writings, trying to distract myself and kept my self-esteem at the reasonable level it had been at. But, as always, it was being knocked down by the mere presence of Christine Poppy, the number-one bachelorette in all of Hogwarts. And as if being a beautiful, make-up extraordinaire, most lusted-after girl wasn't enough; she was a Quidditch star too! Oh, happy days!

We aren't even that great of friends; I think she just puts up with me because I give her answers to our homework. Evil wench!

"…and I met this boy, Miguel! Oh god, was he _amazing!_"

And I did _not _miss the double meaning in that word.

"Sounds like Spain was fascinating," I inserted dully. She nodded and laid back against the seat, fanning herself as she, no doubt, relived moments with the Spaniard, Miguel. Eh, whatever, at least I don't have to talk to her so much.

I pulled out my diary again and flipped through the word-filled pages, looking at the numerous doodles I put in the margins of the pages. There was one where Christy was ugly and flat-chested and invisible while _I _was the outgoing, beautiful, make-up professional! Yes, I have issues, do not question.

I (very discreetly, I might add) picked up a strand of hair and held it up to my eyes, examining the dull red color. Okay, well, it's not _that _dull; in fact, it's the liveliest thing about my looks! Pushing the strand behind my ear, I pretended to sneeze and glanced down at my body. There were my average, C-cup breasts with _no _wonder bra, just a regular blue and purple striped one.

Which no one knows, besides me. My torso was covered in a thin blue T-shirt with a picture of Hello Kitty, her big wide eyes staring right back at you all creepily. Ugh.

My jeans were, of course, faded and frayed and ripped in some places with lots of writing jumbled together. Altogether, my ensemble was nothing too extravagant. And I sure as hell didn't go to _Spain _for my vacation; I stayed at home with my muggle family, exchanging tiny words of conversation and small greetings and tearful goodbyes.

Honestly, I don't think my parents even mind me going away; they'll give me a 'fond farewell' than act as if I had died. My relationship with my whole muggle family is strained; we don't get along so much anymore and with each passing year, I lose more and more interest in the muggle world.

When I leave the house, I'm going to be invisible to them too! The only people who I've _never _been invisible to before.

An awful sob story of the Modern Age!

The compartment door slid open and I flushed when I looked up. James Potter smiled at the two of us although I think he thought I was just some kind of mannequin doll used for decoration.

"Alexa!" he exclaimed and engulfed me in a large hug. I was pretty much past being able to speak at this point, so I just sat there, being hugged by this very strange boy, who pulled away and grinned at me happily. "How was your summer?"

"Er…boring?"

He laughed as my statement turned into a question. But, honestly! What did he _expect?_ I mean, yeah, sure, I helped him last year in potions, but I mean…he actually knew who I was?

"Uh…how was yours, James?"

"Ah! Normal, uneventful, sporty," he answered, waving a hand dismissively. I raised an eyebrow as he flopped down beside me, ruffling his hair unnecessarily. Serious, what's _with _that? As if his hair isn't already messy enough!

I really shouldn't criticize the people who actually know of my existence; bad omen. I sighed and leaned back against the upholstered seat, staring drearily out of the window. It was beginning to rain. How delightful.

"So, James, where's Lily?" Christy asked craftily. Potter rolled his eyes at the girl, his smile turned down slightly at the question.

Hm…I'm not sure why, but I sense some serious hostility between these two. It's like there's some kind of electricity between them.

ZIZIZIZI! Someone gets electrocuted from the tense atmosphere. I hope its Christy. Than her newly redone hair will frizz and puff out like an afro. Ha. Take that, evil wench.

…Oh Merlin, I need to get out of my head. Maybe I'll actually go to Hogsmeade this year, take my mind off of my deliriously depressing life situation. As I continued to wallow in self-pity, I felt something (or someone) poke me. Glancing down, I saw a grinning James.

"Yes, James?" I asked, smoothly. He grinned wider.

"Would you mind if the Marauders share your compartment? I don't feel like searching for one right at the moment," he asked, giving me the large innocent doe eyes.

But I blanched when he said 'Marauders.' As in all four boys. As in Sirius Black will be in here…at the same time _I _am!

…

…

GAH! Not good.

_Say NO!_ my subconscious screamed at me. But, of course, I did not listen. "Yeah, sure, I don't mind."

Stupid, stupid Alexa!

"Sirius will be in here?" Christy squealed. I barely refrained from snorted. I did, however, roll my eyes as she began to apply an unnecessary fresh coat of make-up. Honestly, she already looked like a freaking Greek Goddess! SHE DOESN'T NEED ANYMORE MAKE-UP, DAMN IT!

…Sigh…Sigh…

I have serious jealousy issues. Yes, I know I'm envious; I'm not dense, despite contrary belief, I'm just outwardly in denial while inside I scream at the top of my lungs how much I wish she would eat so much, she'd bloat out like a balloon and never show her face again. A girl can only dream.

"Alexa, have you seen…James?" I looked up and smiled at Remus smally, gesturing towards James, whose head was currently on my thigh, with an exasperated expression. I was used to his overly-friendly attitude after tutoring him last year. If anyone had been lying on my thigh, however, they'd probably end up in the Hospital Wing.

I have quite the hot-headed temper that frightens most people. It just simply amuses me the way they get all scared went my temper goes out of control.

"Why, hello, Moony!" James greeted exuberantly. Remus looked down at James, an amused expression flitting across his features before he sighed and exited. James shot up and huffed before jumping to his feet and following his friend out into the corridor. I sat there, watching the spectacle in silence, than slumped into my seat when James left. Now I was, once again, invisible.

Saddening.

"Leave me alone, Potter."

I perked up instantly at the sound of my savior: Lily, my best friend in all of Hogwarts! Ah, she's come to rescue me from my lonesome loneliness! Yay!

I watched as she walked straight past our compartment, without even a glance.

My savior just ignored me. How rude of her to do so when I am in dire need of company! Other than Malibu Barbie, who isn't much of a conversationalist. I really wish we were good friends; really, I do! But...she's always so...perfect and snobbish, even, and -dare i say?- slutty! It drives me mad, that's what it does! Not to mention the fact she's glared and scowled and whispered rumors about me when my back is turned.

How nice of her! Making sure I get some kind of attention so that I don't die a lonely_, honest_death. Pfft...whatever.

Sigh.

Siiiiigh.

My life needs some sprucing up, I see. Well, it would, if I, you know, actually _had _one.

Today was supposed to be a good day; a **happy** day. But 'tis not so! It has turned from bright to dark; happy to depressing; deep to shallow!

...Ok, I'll admit, the last one really didn't make much sense, but the other two were pretty dramatic! I should become a writer. Then I wouldn't be invisible. Maybe guys will finally notice me and ask me out on many glamorous dates ending in passion filled nights! . . . Gah. My innocence! It would be lost to a stranger! Ok, so the famous and glamorous life-style isn't for me. Too bad, really; I could probably get some good publicity with my Fritish (for those who have no clue what the hell 'Fritish' is, it's a mix between French and British. I made it up myself. Genius, eh?) accent and beloved bilingual tongue!

...

I wish my owl was currently with me. Mina must be all lonely up in the Owlery, bothering the other owls with her mournful hooting. Heh, yeah right. She has more friends than I do. Which is, again, pathetic and depressing.

"Why are you guys in here?"

My head snapped up from it's currently ducked position and I smiled widely at Lily, momentarily forgetting her earlier act of abandonment. "Lils!" I cried out happily, tackle-hugging her, like I so often do. She laughed and hugged me back before shutting the compartment door behind her and sitting beside me.

"So, how were your summers?" she asked curiously. I snorted and shrugged, rolling my eyes to indicate the uneventful, frustrating summer I had suffered through.

"I had to suffer through many boring, non-magical games that put me to sleep better than Slughorn's Sleeping Draught," I said deadpan. Lily laughed and swiped at my shoulder, missing by an inch.

"You could've come and stayed with me!"

I shook my head gravely. "I could do no such thing. My parents wanted me there, so I complied."

Lily stared at me. "You're a pushover masochistic of a person, you know that?"

And I, being the pinnacle of maturity, stuck my tongue out at her. She can not be suffice to live up to my amazing ability of sticking out my tongue when annoyed! ...I'm slowly going insane.

Lily rolled her green eyes in response to my superior tongue-sticking-out (ha!) and turned to an impatient Christy. "How was your summer, Christy?"

And she went off into the explanation of her wonderful, fantisical adventure in Spain with Miguel. Something I constantly notice and never quite fail to feel slightly off about, is that Lily can make friends so naturally. She's just this huge magnet that, instead of attracting metal, she attracts friends. Although, I did hear Michael Wither (ex-boyfriend of Lily's; they're still friends though, so no worries) had some kind of metal plate down near his..._lower regions. _Rumors can be so amusing, as long as they aren't about you or anybody you particularlycare about. I do know that's a rather horrible thing to say, as I had just ranted about Christy and her ludicrious rumors, but honestly, who doesn't enjoy to hear about something so completely idiotic and random and so not true? Personally, the more far-fetched, the better; they're funnier. I don't waste the time I have on spreading them; what would be the purpose of that? To see how they react? Make myself feel big and mighty?

It's people like that who get on my nerves. It's naturally in human nature to be curious; so, of course, most people like to hear of rumors because it spikes their curiosity. Spreading them is a different matter entirely.

Yeah, I know, I can be serious. Although, Sirius is always serious...

HA! Pun!

An extremely overused pun that still remains funny to this day.

"I'm going to go change," I informed the other occupants before walking out of the compartment and down the corridor, heading to the nearest bathroom. People didn't even noticed I passed them, but I suppose I've gotten used to it by now. It's not that big of a deal, really; I'm sure why I make such a big deal out of it. Maybe I'm futher in my insane progression than I orginially thought...

"LEXI!"

And than I was tackled by some moving force. I shrieked (I so told you) and collided with the ground, releasing a loud grunt. It took me minute to realize it was a human squeezing me to death. "Alice!" I gasped.

"I've missed you over the summer!" she cried out joyously, letting go of my body, which I was eternally grateful for. Pulling myself into a sitting position, I smiled widely at my other best friend, Alice Hart. She grinned back at me before dragging me back into a hug. And damn, can she hug! It feels like I'm being squeezed be a Giant! Only, you know, smaller.

"How was your summer?" I asked, standing back up, brushing off my jeans. She shrugged nonchalantly, but I distinctly saw a red color tint her cheeks.

"...Did Frank...?"

Alice nodded vigorously, squealing loudly before engulfing me into yet another hug. I really need to have a talk with her about personal space and the amount of hugs one person can take in a sitting. "Yes, he _finally_asked me out!" she laughed. Alice is probably one of the happiest, most caring, most...understanding people I have the immense fortune to meet. She worries more about her friends than herself, which probably explains why we have trouble dueling in Defense Against the Dark Arts against each other; I can't stand to hurt her and vice versa. Of course, Professor Paril gets frustrated because we both hold back. But honestly, does he truly expect us to hurt each other for practice?

Jeez, what is it with people these days? I bet it's because they lack culture. Not like I actually know what the bloody hell culture is. I don't get much of it either, apparently. "That's great, Alice. Maybe you can double-date with Christy, once she gets Sirius wrapped around her finger," I suggested innocently. But, of course, she knows me oh-so-well and saw right through my innocent façade.

She frowned. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing, I'm just in a bad mood today," I sighed, shrugging. Alice appraised me for a moment before patting my shoulder.

"Don't worry; this year will be fun, you'll see," she encouraged.

Sigh. Always the optimist, that Alice. "Yeah, sure. Well, I have to change," I said, holding up my clothes before walking into the bathroom. I stared at myself in the mirror, frowning. My usually bright violet eyes were dull, lacking the usual 'spark' everyone is always going on about. I've never seen it personally, but maybe it's because I don't entirely care. The bridge of my nose was specked with freckles, light but still noticeable, even on my fifteen-year-old self. I traced my features with my eyes, looking down at my full pink lips, the frown on them obvious. The pink stuck out against my pale skin, along with my vibrant red hair. Unlike Lily's, which is more of an auburn, my red hair is a shining red that gleams with color in the sunlight. I envy Lily for her hair; it doesn't stick out like mine.

Sighing, I got dressed quickly and swung open the door, walking back to my compartment.

GASP. SHOCK. WHOA.

I stopped dead, just outside of the door, watching Lily roll her eyes at something James said and Sirius laughed at while Remus talked to Peter, dutifully ignoring his moronic friends. I blanched.

What. The. Hell.

I thought they left! Augh! This is going to be very awkward.

...

Oh wait...I'm Forever Invisible. They won't even notice me. Well. No more worrying, I can just walk in, sit down, and ignore them as they ignore me. Resolutely, I opened the door, closed it behind me, and waltzed over to my spot, sitting down in the corner while taking out my diary from my bag. Lily looked over at me and smiled, eyeing my diary like a starving lion.

She's always wanted to read it, mainly because I'm so secretive about...well, basically everything. I smiled back apologetically, shaking my head indefinitely while pulling out my quill and ink pot, scribbling down in the empty page. It wasn't even much of an entry; just meanless words jumbled together to keep myself occupied while Christy and Sirius made goo-goo eyes at each other.

Merlin. It's rather degrading...and I'm not even involved in it. Why can't they just go snog and leave the rest of us in peace? Oh yeah...because a certain lady named 'Fate' hates me for something horrible I've done in a past life.

Stupid reincarnations.

I _will_ find out what I did and make up for it. _I will!_

Until then...I'll just...wallow in my self-pity, I suppose...

"Oh! Alexa, I didn't see you!" James exclaimed, looking over at me in shock. I looked up from my writing and smiled, shrugging but not speaking. I wasn't entirely sure what to say to that; I knew he hadn't seen me. I'm invisible, remember?

"How was your summer, Alexa?" Remus asked pleasantly. I sighed and looked out of the window for a minute before smiling back at him. No one needed to know about my parents lack of care; it was no one's business.

"It was...alright, I suppose," I shrugged. His brow creased worriedly.

"You suppose? Is there something wrong?"

Jeez, why do people have to be perceptive, today of all days?! Ugh. My self-pity is slowly slipping away, so I can no longer wallow in it. How sad.

"Uhm...wrong? No, of course not!"

Lily was watching our exchange. "Come to think of it, Lexi, I didn't see your parents at Kings Cross. Don't they usually see you off?"

I snorted involuntarily. "Since when? They did in first year; after that, it was my brother and sister. That's you probably saw the last couple of years. They're both reasonably older than me, so..." I shrugged, tailing off, going back to writing in my diary. Or pretending to, anyway, very aware of the worried looks from Lily, Remus, AND James. Honestly.

You'd think I was holding a razor over my wrist, threatening to cut myself until I bleed to death.

...Whoa. That was rather...um...gory? Depressing? Horrific? Not sure which adjective better fits the scenario above.

"If you don't mind me asking, why don't your parents come?" Remus asked. I glanced up from my diary, my eyes narrowed slightly.

"Hm. Not sure, exactly. It's probably because they have better things to do," I muttered with another shrug. Suddenly, the door slid open and Alice stood there, looking at the large group. My eyes darted over to Sirius, only to see him whispering something remarkably funny into Christy's ear. I looked away as quickly as I could, staring up at Alice.

"Ah...Lily, Remus, there's trouble...a couple of Slytherins," she panted, pointing to the left. Everyone froze for at least three seconds, each of us deducing our own scenario.

Mine consisted of some ugly pug-faced Slytherins shooting various curses at a little Hufflepuff. Then the brave Gryffindors rush in and save the day!

Yes, I realize this isn't very creative, but it'll do.

Lily jumped up and was out of the compartment, followed directly by Remus and I with Sirius and James and (of course) Peter on our tails. Soon enough, a curse went flying past our heads and hit a poor bystander in the background. Instantly, we all had out wands out, pointing them at three oversized Slytherin boys towering over two smaller sized Gryffindors.

Huh. Ironic.

"Alright, that's enough," Lily announced. The snakes looked up at us, sneering their Slytherin sneers. I rolled my eyes. They are so not intimidating.

"Aw, look, it's the Gryffindor gang," one of them mused, his voice loud and slow and utterly stupid sounding.

"Aw, look, it's the Slytherin cowards," Christy mocked. I blinked as Sirius kissed her cheek, obviously impressed. Sighing heavily, I turned back to the Slytherin's and walked forward, trying to get to the terrified (second years, by the looks of it) Gryffindors. Unfortunately, they Slytherins were as stupid as they looked; they blocked my way. I scowled.

"Hey, look, the little mudblood's looking to get past," one chortled. I raised an eyebrow as low, angry hisses were heard behind me. Suddenly, James was right beside me, holding his wand to one of their throats.

"Take it back!"

I sighed as the argument ensued, waltzed past the bulky, brainless bunch and kneeled beside the Gryffindors. I smiled. "Go on, now. I suggest staying in your compartment until the prefects take care of the Brainless Trio over here," I said, pointing at the Slytherins. They nodded quickly and took off, sliding the compartment door shut and pulling the shades down.

Hell, I don't blame them. I remember my first confrontation with big Slytherin jackasses. Ha. They were in the hospital wing for three weeks.

Ah, good times, goooood times.

"Oi, mudblood, we're talking to you!"

Abruptly, I was grabbed by the back of my shirt and pulled up. I gasped in shick before the anger kicked in.

Who the bloody hell do they think they are?!

Without a thought, I send a curse at the nearest window of a compartment, ducking my head as it rebounded and hit the Slytherin thug square in the face. His grip lackened and he fell backwards with a thud. I scowled down at him. "Huh. Mudblood. I'll show you dirty blood," I grumbled, my mood darker than earlier. The other two were looking at me like I was the plague.

Brainless jackasses, that's what they are.

"I suggest, for your own safety, you go back and play with your Pureblood Pals," I snapped irritatedly. They blinked before walked towards me threateningly. However, before they moved so much as an inch, Lily and Remus shot them with two blue lines of fire. They fell to the ground in a heap.

I looked up, hoping, suddenly, Sirius had seen my wonderful display.

That was stupid. He was standing there, snogging Christy shamelessly against the wall of the corridor. I rolled my eyes and walked back to the compartment with the group, talking with Alice and Lily. No one else seemed to realize I was there anymore.

How incredibly shocking.

* * *

**A/N: TA-DA! chapter one is alll finished! it's a bit different from my other one; the style of writing (other than this being first person and Amazing Babes and Arrogant Boys being in third person). Poor Alexa: all invisible and whatnot. Don't worry, she won'te be for long... ;)**

**You so know you want to review. Plz? Pretty plz?**


	2. Hallway Duel and Unforgivable Curses

_I'm not quiet; I'm just plotting your imminent doom._

**-Anonymous**

******

* * *

**

**Two**

Hallway Duel and Unforgivable Curses

_Dear Diary,_

_I've had the most ordinary day a girl can have. I've been back to Hogwarts for three weeks, now, and the only people I've actually talked to are as followed: Lily, Christy, Alice, Remus, and my teachers. THAT IS PATHETIC! I have no life and very few friends and it gets quite lonesome when all of your friends have other friends, beside you. It seems you are the only one I can count on to listen to my ramblings and pitying thoughts without complaint. Siiigh. Well, on the bright side, I got an O on a DADA oral the other day! Yay, the nerd got...oops! This was supposed to be 'bright.' Ahem...Yay, the smart girl got another Outstanding! Hooray!_

_Pathetically Lonely, _

_Alexa Embers_

--------

I'm sure I looked dead to the outside world. But I don't especially care. I was trying really hard to pay attention, but this was near impossible with Sirius groping Christy in the back corner, hiding themselves rather well. And, of course, Professor Binns, didn't notice this; he never notices anything worthwhile! Honestly...he needs to retire. You know, live in peace...oh. Heh, I suppose that chance is gone, eh?

Well, he can stay dead in peace, without having to worry about students and our imprudentminds. Maybe we'll get a History of Magic teacher actually worth listening to. I mean, Professor Binns is...okay, but we need someone who doesn't freaking drawl on and on and on and on! Mm...maybe that new Quidditch Champion, Bradley Binks, could teach us. I heard he graduated from Durmstrang just a year ago! So, he's, what? Three years older than me? Maybe four?

Sigh...daydreams are so much better than reality. I once had one where a brilliant white Unicorn turned into a brilliantly naked man (drop-dead handsome, he was) and whisked me away to happier times where everyone loved me and worshipped me. He treated me like royalty, along with his many servants (he was a prince, of course), spoiling me beyond what I was worth. I didn't object, though; it was nice to have someone care about me so thoroughly.

And he never once pushed to take my innocence. Ah...yes, daydreams are much better than reality. Or my reality, anyway. I'm sure Christy's reality is much better than mine. Than again, everyone's is better than mine, so that's not saying much.

I really wish I hated Christy(evil wench). I really really do. Yes, she annoys me and yes, I am irreversibly envious of her and her good fortune, but do I hate her? Yeah...no. Sigh, I do not. I've never been good at hating people. Well, except my Great-Aunt Merline; she was horrible. And she smelled bad too. But, despite the fact nobody knows of my existence, I don't hate any of them; it isn't their fault, really. I wouldn't notice me, either.

Oh crap...I think Professor Binns just asked me a question.

"Uh...sorry, I didn't catch that," I apologized as people swiveled in their chairs to stare at me. My cheeks flushed an unhealthy red color as I looked down at my desk. Hey, I never noticed that crack before. Wonder what happened?

The ghost's boring deamour did not change. "I asked...," he drawled (yawwwn), "...if you knew which troll conquered the Goblin's territoy in 1846."

I scrambled desperately, not recalling anything about a war between the Trolls and Goblins. Bloody Hell. "Oh, um...well, was it...the one who lived under the bridge?" I asked frantically. My cheeks turned red hot when I realized what I had actually blurted. James was laughing in his seat as Professor Binns actually frowned (ugh!) at me while Christy gave me an odd look (they had actually come up from air when Binns decided to embarrass me endlessly). Lily snorted in her seat beside me and I very nearly banged my head on the table.

"Please pay attention, Ms. Embers."

I nodded meekly and Binns floated back to the front of the class, talking about some gory battle between the Cave (not bridge) Trolls and Hob-Goblins. James snorted once more, flashed me a grin, and turned back to doing...well, whatever he had been doing. Which was definitely not taking notes. I picked up my quill and began to scribble mindlessly on the blank piece of parchment in front of me; I'll look up whatever we did in class today in the library. Or Lily can lend me her notes.

...Yeah, I'm going to the library.

Agh, someones staring at me. I can feel it. My neck is all prickly and my senses are suddenly very sharp. Discreetly, I glanced around the classroom; most students were dozing in their chairs, some leaning back stupidly. I frowned. That was just an accident waiting to happen. Honestly, what person in their right mind would lean back in their chair and fall asleep with the Marauders in the vicinity? Stupid gits; their heads are probably hollow bowls of—

Oh Merlin...I just found out who was staring at me. But why? I'm supposed to be meek, shy, invisible little me. He doesn't even know I exist! Not that I'm complaining, mind you; just terribly confused as Sirius Black stared at me, a smile on his face while Christy tried to drag him back into their previous activities. And he, shockingly, refused her.

SHOCK. GASP. WHOA.

Blushing, I turned back to my mindless doodles, hoping no one noticed me staring at Black, who was still staring at me. I felt a nudge to my ribs and looked up at a suspicious Lily.

Ha, of course she would notice.

'What?' I mouthed, playing innocent. Her eyes narrowed and she began to scribble on a small piece of parchment frantically. I sighed and colored in the large Quaffle on my completely covered parchment. I only looked away when she pushed her piece in my line of vision.

_'What the bloody hell was that about?'_

Ugh. Quickly, I scratched my response.

**'Not sure. He was just...staring at me. And he's never noticed me...ever! Gah. . .what if he's a rapist? Lily!'**

I sent the paper back, smiled when she let out a small peal of laughter before restraining herself and writing her response. I glanced up from my paper and frowned when I noticed Sirius now sitting in the empty spot beside James, near the front of the class. When the hell did he move? He was in the back, practically sexing Christy, now he was in the front-ish? How did Binns _not notice_ this?!

Sheesh! Unreliable teachers...

I read the new note Lily gave me_. 'Ha, funny. But it was odd...don't fall for it, Lexi. He's just a prat who'll get what he wants and leave. Besides, you're too stubborn to let him, so why am I warning you again? Sorry. Ha. Got a bit overprotective there...Anyways, the Hogsmeade weekend is this Saturday. Are you coming?'_

I rolled my eyes. She didn't need to say sorry. Silly girl; she worries too much, that's true, but it's nothing to be sorry for.

**'I don't know...not sure I'll be welcome, Lils. I think I'll just stay here; get in some extra studying and all that rot,**' I wrote back quickly, sliding it over to my best friend. Her face fell at my answer, but she didn't push the subject, although I could tell she desperately wanted to. We sat in silence for the rest of class, neither of us paying attention, like Binns instructed me to do earlier. It was just too tiring.

Ack! I have Divination next. I have no idea why I decided to take that class (again) because all Professor Meline does is assign us homework from our books and has never, not once, predicted anything. Well...in third year, she predicted I'd fall and break my leg...but I had already down that two days previous. So, I'm not sure if that can be called a 'prediction.'

Finally, the small, tinkling bell rang, signaling the end of class. I shot up, stuffed my things into my bag, and walked out of the classroom, repeating _'Not bridge Trolls, Cave_ _Trolls' _in my head over and over again. That really was humiliating, especially because everyone probably believes I'm an idiot and the reason I'm invisible is because I have no social skills and I will forever be alone! ACK!

I stopped dragging my feet when I heard cackling and froze, looked around at the empty hallway, and darted behind a suit of armor. Of course I would get too wrapped up in my thoughts to realize everyone was moving faster than me. And now Peeves is going to find me and get me in horrible trouble.

"Ickle little firsties, run and hide  
Peevesie will find you, not matter how hard you tried!"

I rolled my eyes at his horrible rhyming and stood there, holding my breath, as he floated past my spot without a glance, still cackling. I kept still, grasping my wand out of my bag, and walked out from my spot, heading towards the North Tower with dread. I was going to be in so much trouble; I'm already late. Stupid thoughts distracting me. I kept on walking, humming under my breath to fill the suddenly deafening silence lingering around me. It really was uncomfortable; I hate uncomfortable silence.

Actually, can it be uncomfortable if there's no one else there? Or am I just speeding up the process of my impending insanity?

"Well, well, what do we have here?"

Aw crap.

I whipped around and narrowed my eyes at the four Slytherin girls.

"I believe it's the little mudblood who ratted out Avery last week," one particularly slim girl sneered. Her blond hair was smooth and fell down her back elegantly; he face looked as if she had smelt something rather foul. I wrinkled my nose; I knew who she was: Narcissa Black. And, shockingly, her older sister was standing just beside her. Bellatrix Black's hair was curly and fell to her shoulders, gleaming prettily in the sunlight. She was, no doubt, pretty; but than again, most Black's were.

"If, by 'ratted out', you mean 'cursed him to oblivion', than yes, that's me," I replied calmly. Bellatrix cackled and stepped forward; I stepped back.

"Aw...the little Gryffindor has a sharp tongue," she cooed in a baby voice. I sighed heavily and glared. I really don't want to fight right now.

"Why don't you just turn around and slither on back to your masters lap?" I inquired innocently. That did it.

Bella's eyes widened impossibly large when she realized who I was referring to. Narcissa hissed under her breath, but made no movement to come after me. Her sister did. "You filthy little mudblood!" she screeched and shot a curse at me. Nonverbally, of course, so I had no idea what curse it was.

I threw my bag to the side and ducked away from the stream of light, murmuring, _"Confundo*_," under my breath. It missed Bellatrix, but hit one of her little followers, who instantly dropped her wand and ran off in the opposite direction, just as I intended. Jumping to avoid another hex, I aimed the Conjunctivitis Curse* at Narcissa, successfully hitting her; her eyelids snapped closed and she shrieked in shock. That was a lucky break.

_"Crucio*!"_

My eyes widened and I barely swerved away from the red flash of light that Bellatrix shot at me. She just used an Unforgivable Curse on me! That little...! SHE IS DEAD!

_"Stupefy*!"_

Bellatrix twirled out of the way and cackled loudly. "You think you can take me down with spells like—"

And than there was silence. I smirked, twirling my wand in my hand. "You talk way too much, dearest Bellatrix." She had been mocking so much, she hadn't heard me say, _"Silencio*!"_

Foolish.

Her mouth kept moving, but nothing came out. I rather like that spell. Suddenly, her face turned murderous, and before I could blink, I had a large gash across my cheek. I blinked and glared viciously, ignoring the oozing blood trailing down my cheek, brining my wand up and shooting a flash of blue light at her. I was vaguely aware of the crowd we were gathering from the neighboring classrooms, but I didn't care. Bellatrix Black needed to be taught a lesson.

_"Crucio_!" she hissed again. I hate that curse.

I was suddenly engulfed in a blazing pain; nothing had ever felt like this before. It was like somebody was draining the marrow from my bones; like they were forcing my blood to turn to fire and move the opposite way it was intended to in my veins. My head felt as if it was going to explode from the unimaginable pressure that suddenly appeared. My legs felt like someone was, very slowly, injecting a burning poison into my muscles. It took all I had not to scream. I did collapse to my knees, however, and that seemed like enough to amuse Bella.

And, just as quick as it came, the pain was gone. I gasped and fell to my hands, panting slightly, than clenched my fists, ignoring the screaming protests of my body as I stood up, facing the cackling Slytherin. It suddenly occurred to me that I shouldn't be hearing her; I silenced her. She must know the counter-curse for it...Damn.

_"FiendFyre*_," I muttered, watching as a large spout of fire errupted from my wand. The blazing heat fortified to resemble a large, full-grown lion. Bella's eyes widened slightly before she glared, her laughter gone as the lion pounced, running after her. I was careful to keep it off the ground and away from the walls and students; if it touched them, they would be obliterated. I could only hold the lion for so long, though, and soon, it vanished in a wisp of smoke, leaving a very angry and very vicious Bella.

We stood there, staring at each other, assessing the damage we inflicted on the other. Bella had numerous cuts up and down her arms, a few on her face, and two large gashes on her legs. Her hair was frazzled and wild around her, her eyes blazing with an undisguised loathing. I guess I should really be terrified. But I'm not. She can kill me for all I care; as long as I take her down with me.

Ha. And there I go, being all dramatic. She can't kill me in school and definitely not in front of all of these students. Too many witnesses.

I knew the damage she inflicted on me surpassed what I did to her; that much was obvious. It doesn't mean I'm losing; just being more reckless. I could feel the cold sweat on my face from the Cruciatus Curse; that pain was still fresh in my mind. The gash on my cheek was still oozing blood, which was down dripping onto my robes. There must be an ever-lasting blood flow charm on it or something. Actually, I don't believe there's such a thin as an 'ever-lasting-blood-flow' curse.

I must just be an easy and heavy bleeder. How gross.

"WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!"

I started at the sound of Slughorn's voice and refrained from rolling my eyes. Of course the Slytherin Head of House would find us! Looks like I'm only lucky when I duel people.

"Lexi?"

I turned around at my name and winced when I saw Lily. At first, she looked shocked, than a look of complete horror replaced it as she ran out from the crowd and over to me. "Hey Lils," I greeted quietly.

"Ms. Black, what is the meaning of this?" Slughorn boomed, pushing through the crowd. I sighed defeatedly.

"This is not going to end well..." I muttered to Lily, who was fussing over my injuries like a day-care mother. Honestly, my best friend is more of a mother than my actual mother.

Did that make sense?

"Ah! What are you doing here?" Lily hissed to someone. I looked over and immediately looked away; it was the Marauders. Oh Merlin...did they see the whole thing? Fantastic. Lovely. Wonderful. _Splendid._

Not like I'm not proud of what I did; I just don't want the unneeded attention they were definitely going to give me.

"Ms. Embers!"

I looked over at Slughorn and very nearly tried to sink into the floor. "This display was horrid! You should know better than to provoke other students!"

I shot a look to Bella, who was smirking on the sidelines, looking rather smug. I looked back at Slughorn. "I'm sorry, Professor. I guess I just couldn't resist the...temptation of cursing Bellatrix into next year. Sorry."

He looked anything but amused. "ONE MONTH'S DETENTION AND FIFTY POINTS FROM GRYFFINDOR!"

I only winced at the last part. Everyone's going to be pissed at me for losing those fifty points when we were in the lead for the House Cup. Great. This day just keeps getting better and better. Lily touched my arm.

"Alexa, why are you so pale?"

I stiffened. Ah, so Lily hadn't seen everything. Heh, no, I suppose I should've realized that when she never attacked Bellatrix with her amazing skills. She's better than I am at dueling. In answer to her question, I shrugged nonchalantly. "No idea, Lils. So, Professor, are you going to send me to the Headmaster? Or can I get to class?"

Slughorn's mustache wavered as he breathed heavily, his face red with anger. "Go to your common room and stay there until McGonagall comes to speak with you!"

Ok, now I'm scared. I stared at him in shock. "Y-you aren't seriously going to tell her?"

"You bet I am!" he roared. I flinched and walked over to grab my bag, slinging it over my shoulder morosely. If there is one teacher who terrifies me when they're mad, it's McGonagall.

Sob. But as I began to head in the direction of Gryffindor Tower, Lily spoke up. "But, Professor, Alexa needs to go to Madam Pomfrey! She looks absolutely dreadful--sorry, but it's true--" she added upon seeing the look I gave her, "and get her wounds treated! Please, sir!"

I snorted softly at the 'sir' Lily added; she always was his favorite pupil. Sometimes I wonder if he's a pedophile undercover.

Slughorn sighed and ran a hand down his face. "Ms. Evans..."

"Come one, Professor; look at her!" James piped up, thoroughly shocking me. I blinked and watched as he motioned towards me; I huffed and crossed my arms, staring defiantly at the two people who are so convinced I'm some kind of cripple.

"I'm perfectly okay, thanks," I declared. I grinned internally when my voice didn't shake from the strain my body was going through. It was still in slight pain from the Torturing Curse, but it was, all in all, exhausted. My legs shook slightly, trying desperately to support my weight as I scowled at Lily, who was glaring right back. "I appreciate your concern, really, but I'm fine! See!" I twirled around, my arms outstretched, to show my point.

And, of course, I wobbled a bit when I stopped, my head spinning rapidly. "Whoo...okay, I'm a little tired, but I can sleep better in _my_ bed in _my_ dorm!" I conceded slightly. I yawned widely and shot Bellatrix a dirty look when I saw her silent laughter; of course she would know what her stupid curse had done. Ok, I lied earlier when I said it's hard for me to hate people**;** I **hate **Bellatrix. I hate her to her very core and would be happy to see her get expelled from Hogwarts. She's a despicable human being and doesn't deserve anything she has. I hope she provokes someone who's stronger than her and gets herself killed. And, I sure as hell, hope that it's a muggleborn! Or a half-blood. Or even a blood-traitor; just to show her how purity of blood doesn't matter when it comes to fighting.

Slughorn looked from me to Lily to James and back to me when suddenly someone else spoke up. "Professor, I agree with James and Lily; Alexa should get some kind of treatment."

I scowled at Remus impressively, my arms crossed tightly as he avoided my gaze.

"I say let her go to the common room."

My stomach flipped stupidly at his voice; I was really rather hoping he'd stay quiet. But, now, I'm immensely happy he spoke up. I pointed at Sirius. "Ha! See, I'm fine! Please, Professor? I won't cause any trouble, I swear!" I called out, wincing as my cheeks stretched out while I talked; I would need to heal that wound. Slughorn stared at me, his previous anger gone and a small spark of concern in his eyes.

Huh. So he actually has a heart. Shocking, I didn't think he did.

Finally, after a few minutes of silence, he sighed, motioning towards Gryffindor Tower. "Go and Minerva can decide what to do with you."

I was about to thank him when I analyzed his words and huffed. "What, am I some kind of object? 'Decide what to do--Oomph!"

Lily covered my mouth and began to drag me back to the common room, gesturing for the crowd to part. I suddenly realzied I don't want to be alone in my dormitory with Lily. She's going to be veeery mad at me for not going to the hospital wing. But honestly; what could Madam Pomfrey do that I can't in my dorm? I know plenty of healing charms that are simple and easy. I have bandages and essence of murlap in the bathroom; those will help heal my deeper wounds! No point in bugging Madam Pomfrey...

Not to mention my fear of hospitals. I know the hospital wing isn't a 'hospital', per se, but it sure looks like one, smells like one, and feels like one; that's enough for my instincts to scream, 'Get the hell out of here!'

"Lily," I mumbled into her hand as Slughorn ordered the crowd of students to go back to class, "let go!"

"You-" she jabbed my arm "-are a bloody moron! Taking on Bellatrix on your own like that!"

I decided not to tell her about the other three. Oh yeah...what ever happened to that last girl, whom I did not hit with a curse or anything else? Hm...I bet she ran away. There's always a coward among them. Always.

I shrugged. "She's not that scary--Ow!" I winced as Lily's hand tightened around my mouth. I chanced a look at her features, only to actually reel back in fear. She wasn't angry...oh no.

She. Was. Furious.

Grrrreat.

Now I'm terrified of McGonagall _and_ Lily.

"I don't bloody care if she was scary! Balderdash," she snapped. The Fat Lady looked awfully affronted.

"Don't worry, love; she's just mad," someone reassured. I almost groaned out loud. Of course the Marauders would follow me! GAH! I can not get a fucking break!

Merlin.

Hmph.

...

Ok, I'm better now. Lily practically threw me on the couch and scowled down at me, her hands on her hips; a perfect impersonation of my mother when I disappoint her which is, let's be honest, all the time. I rubbed my jaw tenderly. "Jeez, Lily; thanks for very nearly _crushing my jaw_!"

"Oh, stop being dramatic," she snapped. I pouted slightly, but didn't object. As I said, she scares the living crap out of me when she's angry. And she's reallllyangry right now. You know what's sad? I haven't even written my will yet. I wonder if she'll allow me time to do so before she murders me in cool blood? I suppose I could ask her...nah, that'll set her off. She's like a time-bomb; she's going to go off, and you know it, but you can't be quite sure when that is exactly and you sure as hell don't want to speed up the process.

A bomb is to Lily as Lily is to a bomb. There's a useful anaology.

...Silence. The boys were watching Lily and me nervously, although Sirius seemed pretty calm, probably waiting for the show to start. James was staring at Lily as if she were the freaking sun and Remus kept glancing between us, looking ready to intervene, if necessary.

Sigh. Too bad he wasn't there earlier in the fight.

...

...

...

...

...

"WHAT THE BLOODY HELL WERE YOU THINKING?!"

BOOOOOOMM!

I flinched and shrank a bit in my spot. I had enough brains to know that was a rhetorical question and to not anwer it.

"SHE USES _DARK MAGIC,_LEXI! YOU COULD'VE BEEN SERIOUSLY HURT! YOU WERE LUCKY TO GET AWAY WITH WHAT YOU DID!" she shrieked at me. I sighed and shifted my bag off my shoulder.

"You don't need to tell me she uses dark magic, Lils," I grumbled quietly. That wasn't really meant for the others to hear, but obviously, I said it a little louder than intended 'cause Lily stopped ranting and raving, and just stared at me. I blanched a bit, but ran a hand through my hair casually.

"Are you done? Can I go to bed?"

Lily blinked. "What did you say?"

"Eh?...Can I go to bed?" Playing clueless never works, but I can have hope. She sat next to me while Remus took the other side. I looked from the Marauder, who looked abruptly angry, and Lily, who looked on the verge of tears. I shouldn't have said anything. I regret it! TAKE IT BACK FOR ME, MERLIN!

...

And I just lost a bit of my sanity. Returning back to the situation at hand, I shrugged. "I didn't say anything."

"Don't lie," Remus snapped. I blinked in shock. He's never talked to me like that before. Well, it's not like we talk very often, but when we do, he's usually really sweet and kind. Not now.

I scoffed. "Oh, come on off it! Everyone knows she does Dark Magic! It's not exactly a secret," I cried out, throwing my arms in the air before slumping back against the cushions on the couch. Lily thought deeply for a second, mulling over my excuse in her head, before sighing heavily and looking down at the table in front of us. Everyone was quiet until James spoke the question that was, obviously, on everyone's mind.

"Did she use dark magic on you?"

It was barely a movement, but Lily caught it; I flinched. She shot up, her eyes melting in pure fury.

"She did! I'm going to murder that...that..." she stumbled over a proper phrase to call Bella. I looked up.

"Evil wench?" I suggested, my lip twitching slightly. Lily blinked and looked down, meeting my gaze, and laughed quietly. It was breathy and could hardly be called a laugh; but, alas, it sounded slightly like one. She turned serious insantly. Sometimes I think my best friend my just be bi-polar. But eh, what do I know?

"We have to tell the Headmaster."

I shook my head. "No we do not."

"What? Are you serious?"

My lip twitched but I refrained from the pun. Someone else didn't though.

"No, I am. Honestly, Evans, I think you're losing your touch," Sirius piped up. Lily scowled at him but he just laughed in response.

"Anyways, I agree with her--Alexa, is it?" He turned to me. I almost blushed as I got his undivided attention, if only for second.

"Yep, that's me," I managed to say, my voice sounding firm and not-shaky at all. It did not betray me! I can't say the same for my face, however; he grinned at me and I instantly turned a scorching red. Sirius raised an eyebrow and his grin widened, but he turned his attention back to Lily.

"Dumbledore won't be able to do a thing to my dear cousin," he explained, a note of impeccable loathing entering his usually composed voice. "My uncle will make sure of that."

Lily let out a cry of frustration. "We have to do something! We can't let her get away with this!"

I stood up and slung my bag over my shoulder before walking away from the group. "Leave it be, Lily. I don't really care, anyways; I just want to go to bed. You know, I used to think getting burned by the curling iron in first year was painful. Well, not anymore! Honestly, whoever invented the Cruciatus Cruse was a seriously disturbed person. Mental, that's what they were. 'Oh, I have an idea to pass the time! Let's make a spell to torture people!' Bloody jackasses," I grumbled as I walked up the stairs, perfectly aware of the laughing boys by the couch. The laughing was more of a relieved sound.

They were actually worried I had been hurt. Aw.

I can't help but wonder; why? I'm invisible! James didn't even know I was alive until last year!

I mean, it's as if-Ah! My bed, how I've miss you!

I dropped my bag by the door and leapt into the soft mattress, burying my face in my pillow cozily. I never heard Lily yelling at James or Sirius calling Christy's name as she entered the common room or Peter's wheezy laugh or James's complaints or Remus's fond reproving comments. I only heard my own heart beat and breathing until I faded into uneasy dreams, which I awoke from multiple times through the night.

Oh, tomorrow's going to be fun.

* * *

* words

_-_Confundo: the confundus curse; makes the the object/person confused or disorientated or believe/do what the spell-caster wants

_-_Conjunctivitis Curse: aimed at the eyes of the victim and causes their eyelids to crust together so that they can no longer see

-Crucio: Cruciatus Curse; used to torture the victim. Causes intense pain. One of the three Unforgivable Curses

-Stupefy: knocks the victim unconscious

-Silencio: forces the targeted person to fall silent, unable to made any audible noise

-FiendFyre: colossally powerful enchanted fire that devours everything in it's path and has enough consciousness to follow it's victimes. Often takes the shape of a vicious animal

information found on: hp-encyclopedia(dot)com

* * *

_Oh how I adore you. Oh how I thirst for you. Oh how I need you._

**Skillet--Comatose**


	3. Blake Riley

_People are going to want you, need you, exceed you, take you, love you, hate you, play you,_

_rate you, save you, and break you. But that's what makes you._

**-Anonymous**

* * *

**Three**

Blake Riley

_Dear Diary,_

_Hullo loyal little book of mine! I have something big to tell you. No, really, it's _huge_! It's not like that time I wrote about my…uhh…_monthly visitor_ in first year. Or my brand new curves (which are still developing) in third year; no, this is much better! Apparently, even though she was mad and most definitely disappointed, McGonagall managed to cut my detentions to three weeks and didn't even ask what happened! WHOO! … Oh, it seemed so much more…amazing before I wrote it down like the lonely little nerd I am. Though, I admit, I'm not so lonely anymore. James knows who I am now and talks to me quite often, along with Remus. Sirius is too busy with his 'girlfriends' and Peter…well, I'm not completely sure he can even talk…Ah well._

_Slightly less invisible, _

_Alexa Embers_

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"Lily…I don't think…"

I watched as Alice tried to convince our lovely red-headed pal that the dress she was trying to slip on was, in fact, made for a nine year old. Of course, the top witch in our year hadn't quite noticed this little fact due to her boiling anger. Sigh. James really needs to back off a bit because when she gets mad, who has to deal with her?

Yeah, that's right; me. And I don't have the patience necessary to deal with it.

"Ack!"

I raised a brow, watching interestedly as Lily tipped off her bed and onto the floor. It was rather hysterical actually. You see, she had barely gotten the dress over half her torso and arms, so her long pale hands were sticking up out of the long black sleeves, her head hidden in the fabric when she fell. Also, her cry was muffled.

Her fall, however, was not.

"Oh dear, I tried to tell you," Alice fretted, gently pulling the dress off our friend. Unfortunately, everything was looking a bit blurry to me on account of the tears in my eyes brought on by the uncontrollable laughter racking my body. My covers began to slip off the bed as I laid back, roaring with laughter, holding my sides in an attempt to stop the sharp pains that accompanied my fit. The soft 'plop' of a pillow hitting the hard floor was barely heard as Lily sent me multiple death glares.

But really, what did she expect me to do? She's the one who, first, tried to fit into a dress made for a child, and two, is now parading around in her mismatching undergarments.

Really, whoever told her that a bright pink bra goes with a pair of Peter-Pan knickers needs to have some kind of brain-scan performed on them. I was very tempted to reach into my trunk and grasp my Wizard-Camera to snap the unforgettable moment in time. But I actually do value my life.

"Lily, what are you looking for?" I asked from my spot ten minutes later, glancing up from my potions book. She glared over at me but must have decided staying mad was too much of an effort because she just dropped the stink eyes and gave me a pleading look instead.

"Something to wear, of course! I have no clue what Daniel will be expecting and I don't want to appear too eager, you know? I just really want to—"

Whoa, wait, back UP!

"Wait! Who's Daniel?" I demanded my hands on my hips in a mock-irritated fashion. Lily didn't stop running around.

"My date for Hogsmeade." I almost let out a wistful sigh, but held it back at the last minute. I really did want to go; I have been there before, but only once, back in third year. It didn't turn out so well and I do not want a repeat of that incident.

"What? A date?"

I looked over at the door, watching Christy walk in to the dorm, positively glowing. Before Alice could ask, she announced, "Sirius and I are officially dating."

Gah.

I'm not sure what I can say at this point except the following: EvilwenchIhopeallyourhairfallsoutintheshowerandyougetranoverbytheKnightBus!

Whew. That…was a mouthful.

But I guess I'm not really surprised; it was bound to happen, sooner or later. It's like the cycle of life; Sirius will get his sights set on a certain girl, snog them a few times before 'popping the question', than you hear about the scandalous things the two do in broom cupboards (I actually think he keeps a record for the number of girls he's shagged, if I listened to James correctly), and, not three days later, you hear of a tearful breakup consisting of sobbing girls, annoyed Black's, and make-up sex with another girl. It always turns out the same.

And, although I am not fond of Christy (ack, evil WENCH!), I don't want to see her degrade herself over some playboy-of-a-male. I mean, yeah, I have a crush on him; have for the past year, but still…It doesn't mean I'd jump into bed with him the first chance I get.

I protect my innocence very strongly, thank you, and I will not lose it to just anyone.

And the mood has to be right. I've always had an odd fantasy to make love on a beach in the Bahamas.

…

…

I can not believe I just said that. Please, disregard that last statement.

The girls spent the next few hours giggling and talking and gossiping endlessly, Lily jumping around to get dressed. They were leaving at three o'clock and when Christy had walked in, it was about noon. When they left (finally!), it was just before their designated departure time, leaving me in the blissful silence of my room.

The relaxation lasted for maybe…oh, fifteen minutes. Then I saw it.

It was crawling on the window, its eight long legs moving slowly and creepily up the glass while the large black body of the spider moved in sync with the motions. To say the least, after gathering a few essentials, I darted out of the dorm and into the common room in ten seconds flat. I stood there, leaning against the wall, panting for several long seconds before I heard my name.

"Er…Lexi?"

I frowned and looked over at the couch. "James? What're you doing here? I thought you'd be at Hogsmeade."

The boy's usually cheery face darkened and he began to mutter under his breath as I walked over, plopping beside him on the red and gold emblazed couch. I raised a brow at his seemingly very angry mood, internally debating whether or not I should ask what's wrong.

He started rambling before I came to a decision.

"Lily turned me down this morning when I asked her to go with me, than I found out that Remus, Peter, and Sirius all have their own little lovelies to take! –PETER GOT A DATE BEFORE ME!- When I actually thought about tagging along, Sirius all but ripped me apart viciously, telling me how he needs 'alone time' with Christy—bloody bastard, as if he doesn't get enough alone time in the damn broom cupboards with her! Even Frank Longbottom got a date today! How incredibly upsetting is that?"

I blinked once…

Twice…

And three times before actually registering what he said. With a scowl, I grabbed a piece of folded parchment off the table and whacked him over the head with it. "You moron—lay off Lily for a while, eh? Because every bloody time you ask her out, I have to deal with her irrational temper!"

Rubbing his head with a small pout, he muttered something that sounded curiously like, "I see where she gets it from."

But I let it pass. The unoffending piece of parchment that I had so brutally used (sorry paper) to whack James was folded neatly, the clean surface staring back at me. I narrowed my eyes.

"AH! Where'd it go? I can't have lost it! Sirius will have my head and hang it above his mantle piece, the words 'Prongs Potter, the unreliable prat who—" James's voice suddenly stopped rambling and his annoying shuffling, too, stopped. I looked over at him, only to see his hazel eyes locked on the piece of parchment I was so conveniently holding. We stared at each other for a long moment.

It kinda felt like those old Western Movies, when two guys are staring each other down from across a real dusty town while one of those weed things just goes bouncing by. It's all tense and quiet, except for the weird music (which the characters can't hear, of course) until one of them goes, "This town ain't big enough for the two of us." And then they start shooting like crazy.

…

…Yeah…

ANYWAYS…

We continued to stare and, suddenly, we both leaped at the same time. He reached for me wildly, but I was too quick with my cat-like reflexes and jumped out of the way, running to the opposite side of the common room. Or, you know, that was my destination; unfortunately, I experienced some turbulence on the way, courtesy of a very out-of-place chair and ended up on the floor, face first.

Now I know why my parents didn't give me the first name 'Grace.'

"Ow! Damn it, stupid—GAH! Oof, James!"

Taking advantage of my moment of clumsiness, James decided to jump on me, reaching for the parchment. Really, how pathetic!

"Get off of me, Potter, before I hex you into oblivion!" I threatened, finally managing to throw off the boy. I leaped up and stood, brushing off my jeans while keeping a death grip on the seemingly important parchment. I held it up to my head, pointing at it. "Now, what's so important about this parchment?"

James crossed his arms tightly, sitting on the floor defiantly. "I can't tell you. You aren't a Marauder."

Oh, so he wants to play it that way? Ha. Fine. I walked away from James and back over to the couch.

"Alright, I guess you don't want it _that _bad. I'll just have to keep it," I stated nonchalantly, tucking it into my bag, clutching the sack close to me as I heard James rush over. He looked at me pleadingly.

"Aw, come on, Lexi! I need that!"

I grinned. "Nah, you don't need it. You want it. There is a difference there, James."

His hazel eyes scowled at me angrily, but I just grinned wider.

Hehe! I am so vindictive.

I'm not sure if that's a good thing, but whatever.

After another Western-stare down, James sighed heavily, slumping his shoulders in defeat. "Fine, fine, you win! But I need the map to show you what it is."

I frowned and looked at the blank paper. "It's…a map? _You _own a _map_?"

He laughed sarcastically. "Ha! Ha! You are _so _funny, Lexi."

I shrugged and handed the paper over, letting him unfold it carefully and put his wand to the cream-colored parchment. He mumbled something I didn't catch and, suddenly, black dots and lines and shapes appeared on the paper. I gasped and pulled James closer, staring at the newly revealed map.

It was a map of Hogwarts. The rooms and staircases and Hall's were outlined exquisitely, but that wasn't what surprised me. Small, labeled dots scurried around the surface, some unnaturally close to each other in cupboards and others moving hurriedly down different hallways. I gaped openly and snatched it from James, taking in the sight eagerly.

"Merlin's beard…James, did you make this?" I asked, astonished. My tone really was not helping his already inflated ego, but I didn't realize this until after I asked.

He puffed out his chest proudly and nodded, striking a pose while mussing his hair. I rolled my eyes and drank in the map, watching numerous dots move around the castle leisurely. "Wow…this is…incredible, really! Blood brilliant!"

He took the map back and touched his wand to the map, his mouth opening to say an incantation. But he suddenly stopped, hesitated, than turned to me, grinning madly. "Oi, Lexi…do you really want to stay here?"

I raised a brow. "Not particularly, but there's nothing—Wah!"

He grabbed my wrist and began to drag me away. I don't think he honestly notices my lack of coordination, but if there had been any doubt before, there sure as hell wasn't now! I very nearly stumbled several times, almost knocking James over four times, and rammed into walls at least nine. But he didn't seem to care; he just kept dragging me along.

Bloody idiot…

Finally, we came to stop at the One-Eyed Witch statue and he glanced at the map before touching the hump of the stone, muttering another spell which I had never heard off, and the hump popped open like a trunk on a muggle car. I blinked as James climbed in.

"Follow after me, okay?"

I was pretty much not capable of speech, so I just nodded instead. That's safe. And than he was gone. I heard the sound of sliding fabric, listening as it got farther and farther away until a soft 'crunch' was heard. "Alright, come on, than!"

I hesitated, biting my lip, before muttering, "Oh what the hell?" and jumping in after the boy.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"Holy Animagus! We're in Hogsmeade!" I exclaimed, crawling out of the tunnel and into the cellar of Honeydukes. James nodded, his grin wide and proud, before putting a finger to his lips, and tip-toeing up the steps. He was careful not to step on the creaky wood, avoiding boxes and such until he reached the door and opened it a sliver. He looked around than motioned for me to follow him.

I really did try to be sneaky. Honest. But, unfortunately, I have no stealthy genes in my whole body, so, naturally, I stepped on every creaky step. James kept glancing out of the door nervously, checking for anyone, but, luckily, nobody did.

Seeing as I'm not a very lucky person, it must've been James's luck that saved us from being caught. I mean, seriously, taking me on a sneaky outing is like wearing a neon sign on you neck with the words 'I'M BEING SNEAKY' flashing in bright colors. We entered the shop and quickly blended in with the crowd of students, pretending to be looking at different sweets before exiting. I laughed giddily.

"That was so much fun! I've never really snuck around before!"

James looked at me as if I had just declared I was shaving my head bald and joining a Cannibalistic Cult in South Africa. "Never? At all?"

I shook my head, my face turning a red color as I scuffed my feet on the pavement. "I've…well, I've never really had a reason to…" I muttered. James frowned, a crease forming between his eyes, so, not wanting to worry him, I grinned widely and waved my hand dismissively. "Ah, no worries! Let's go look for the others! Preferably Remus and Lily; I don't much feel like seeing Christy and Sirius welded together."

James grinned madly at the mention of Lily and nodded, grabbing my wrist and dragging me away…again. I rolled my eyes and just let him, smiling at a few (very very few) people I knew. The streets were overflowing with students and other people who were really too old to be considered students. Some of them were too old to be considered my grandparents. And, let me tell you, _that's _old.

After a few minutes of mindless dragging, I finally spoke up. "So, uh, James? Do you have any idea as to where Lily could be, exactly?"

He shook his head.

Well…that's just peachy! We have no clue where our target is, so now we're going to have to wander aimlessly. And I keep getting knocked into tall, obese people as James dragged me through the crowd relentlessly. Stupid big people.

I'm not quite sure if I've mentioned this, but I am remarkably short. Whereas most people my age are, at least, five-foot-two, I'm still stuck at four-eleven. I am so short; I could be considered one of Santa's little elves!

Or a house-elf…

Ohh…depressing thought, that is. I don't _think _I'm ugly enough to be a house-elf. But, than again…not many guys notice me among my peers…oh no! I LOOK LIKE A HOUSE-ELF!

…I should've just stayed in the castle. I can't be trusted among normal, average and beautiful people.

"EVANS! I found her! EVANS!" James cried out, breaking out into a run, releasing my hand (thank goodness). Unfortunately, that left shy, small me in the middle of a rambunctious, large crowd of strangers. I tried to see over the heads of the random people, trying to spot anybody I knew. I succeeded in ramming into a few people, who pushed me backwards, making me even more lost.

Goodness…stupid rude people…

Finally, after me tossed around like a freaking rag doll, I speed-walked (I am physically incapable of running without falling) into a store. Breathing a sigh relief, I opened my eyes, only to freeze.

Pink; it…was…everywhere. I stared, slack-jawed, at the inside of Madam Puddifoots Café, the paradise for lovey-dovey couples.

Oh dear…I just gagged.

My eyes scanned the tables frantically and, seeing as a lady called 'Fate' hates me with a burning passion, I saw two people I was hoping to avoid at all costs; Sirius and Christy were sitting in the back, kissing shamelessly, as usual. Also, I noted, Sirius's black button-up shirt was dangling off of one arm.

Hm.

I shook my head and whipped around, only to ram into a tall, broad chested-person. I'm pretty sure I made some kind of noise as I tumbled backwards, but I can't be 100% positive. As I prepared myself for the impact, I felt two strong arms stop me. I open my eyes and blinked rapidly four times, staring blankly at a boy I recognized from school. He smiled at me.

"Are you alright?"

It took me a few minutes to realize he was actually talking to me. "Me? Oh, yeah, I'm fine; peachy, even! I'm used to falling, you know, cause I'm pretty much a magnet for accidents and such and—"

I stopped talking and flushed a red color as the boy released me. I was about to run away and die in a hole when Mystery Boy knelt down to my eye-level and appraised me. I swallowed to the best of my abilities, only to realize it was tongue that was blocking my air-passages.

Un-swell, you damn muscle, you!

"Well, you _seem _alright…" the boy finally said. I blinked and nodded.

"I-uh-I said that."

Well, no shit.

He chuckled and grinned at me. "But, just to make sure, I think I should buy you something to eat."

My mind went blank except for one message: Is he _flirting _with _me_?

I looked around at the café, only to notice that most of peoples eyes were on us. I flushed brightly and looked at the door desperately. "Um…well, I mean, you don't have to, I'll be fine; you know, I actually didn't _hit _the ground, so yeah…uh…I'm just gonna shut up now."

He laughed again and grinned down at me, now standing at his normal height. "Who said I had to? Can't I buy you lunch because I want to?"

"Well, of course, but why in the world would you want to buy _me _lunch?"

"Why not?"

Huh. Good question. But _I _have a good answer!

"Because I'm invisible."

…

…

It sounded a whole lot better in my mind, really.

He raised a brow. "No, you're not. Well, not to me."

I ignored the collective 'aw's from the pansies in the room and blushed before whispering, "Yes, well, I am hungry. But I am not eating here." I glanced around at the couples making goo-goo eyes at each other for emphasis.

Mystery Boy laughed and looped his arm with mine, walking back out into the crowd. I gulped, but he kept a firm hold on me as we made our way to the Three Broomsticks.

I actually made it. How cool.

"OH! What's your name?" I finally asked as he held the door open for me. I smiled when the warm air hit me, whisking away the frigidness of outside. He led us over to a nice round table in the back, away from the large crowd of students.

"Blake Riley," he answered calmly, pulling out my chair. Aw…so gentlemanly.

"Alexa Embers," I replied before he walked off to fetch us some drinks and food. I took this time to check my breath, my hair, my bra (it comes unclasped, you see), and my armpits. Luckily, everything was in order; I didn't look too horrible and I didn't, in any way, stink.

Such good lu—Oh wait, I'm saying it! I'll jinx myself.

"LEXI! Gosh, there you are! I'm so sorry I lost you! I didn't mean to, honest!"

I looked over and grinned at James, who was staring at me pleadingly. "Don't worry about it, James; I found a friend, so it's all good."

He took an empty seat beside me and grinned, wiggling his brow. "A _friend, _eh? What kind of _friend?_ A good _friend _or a funny _friend_ or a—"

Gosh. Could he put any more emphasis on 'friend?'

"James," I laughed. "I just met him, alright! You know Blake Riley, right?"

"The Ravenclaw, playboy-wanna-be?"

I blinked and frowned. "He is not."

"Is too, Lexi."

"Do you want to know who's a playboy-wanna-be? Sirius Black, that's who; not Blake Riley."

James grinned at me again. "Sirius isn't a playboy _wanna-be_; he _is _a playboy. You aren't telling me something I don't already know, Lexi."

I rolled my eyes. Of course I'm not; I know that. I bit my lip, thinking about the boy. I'm really getting sick of pining over him when he, most obviously, isn't going to turn my way anytime soon, if at all. I should stop chasing after someone who isn't chasing me back; honestly, I need to get my first kiss already.

No, I haven't had my first kiss yet; get over it, you experienced kisser, you.

Blake Riley was the first guy, ever, to show any inkling of interest in me; I should grab him now, right?

Maybe if I ignore my feelings for the stupid Black, I can have a nice, happy relationship with Blake.

After all, I've never really tried to _ignore _my feelings for Black; if anything, I've been feeding them with my self-pitying and depressing thoughts of loneliness.

"Here you are Alexa." I looked up as Blake pushed through the crowd and set down a plate of steaming food, along with a butterbeer. I smiled at him widely and took a deep drink of my butterbeer, glancing at James meaningfully.

"Goodbye, James," I said, putting my glass down. He blinked, than grinned manically and hopped away. I rolled my eyes and turned back to Blake. "He's such an idiot."

"Is he your boyfriend?" Blake asked after a moment of hesitation. I choked on my drink and coughed until the drink had dislodged from my throat. I stared at him.

"Are you mad? Of course he isn't! We just became friends. Besides, he's in love with Lily," I snickered, shaking my head while taking one of the chips on the platter. Blake grinned widely and I finally began to appraise him. Well, his looks, anyway.

As I've already pointed out, he's tall; taller than Sirius and James, who's about five-four. I think Sirius is an inch or something like that, taller than James. Blake looked to be about five-six.

As I said, he's tall.

His skin was a deep-tan color which made his bright green eyes stand out. Beneath his shirt, I could see his very well-toned chest.

How sexy…I always liked a guy with muscles, but not, like body-builder muscles. Those are gross.

"What year are you, Blake?" I inquired curiously, bringing my eyes away from his chest and back up to his eyes. He smiled, his white teeth gleaming against his tan skin.

"I'm a sixth year; what about you, Alexa?"

I blushed. Really, I blush so easily, it's pathetic. "Oh…I'm a fifth year. But my mom says I'm mature for my age."

Blake threw his head back and laughed, making my face turn a deeper red color. But when he looked back at me, he didn't hold any look of mocking like I thought he would; he just looked amused by my comment.

Hey, I amuse a hot guy! How amazing is that?

"Do I amuse you?" I asked timidly. He chuckled and nodded, reaching over to grasp a piece of roast beef. I flushed again and turned to my glass of butterbeer, bringing it to my lips and taking a drink.

"I hope I didn't seem rude; it's just that I agree," he said, looking at me apologetically. I smiled back reassuringly, taking another chip and popping it into my mouth.

"No worries; so, what's Ravenclaw like?" I asked. And so the conversation began.

From the many pros and cons of Ravenclaw, we went to the many pros and cons of Gryffindor, to Quidditch (apparently Blake plays on the Ravenclaw team), to our studies, and than to ourselves. Apparently, he likes girls who are a bit more conservative than the ones who flaunt around like a band of merry whores, and doesn't like it when someone pretends to love someone, just to get them into bed.

Ah. Such a rare trait these days.

"Are you muggle-born?" he asked. I nodded, finishing off my butterbeer.

"Yeah, I am. It's odd, coming here for the year, than going back and acting like Hogwarts and Magic don't exist. It's also strange because now most of the neighbor kids my age are all smoking a drug called Marijuana. Or, they say they are, anyways; I don't think they do, but whatever."

Blake nodded. "Same here; I'm a muggleborn and I have the same problems with my muggle friends."

I glanced down at my watch and sighed, standing up. "Well, this was a lot of fun, really, but I need to study; I've got a test on Monday," I explained, frowning. It was later than I thought; almost five already. Blake looked a bit disappointed but stood up and gestured for me to go first.

Such a gentleman; another rare trait nowadays.

We walked back to the castle in a comfortable silence and halfway there he grabbed my hand softly, timidly. I flushed but allowed it; I would be an idiot not to.

Honestly.

A guy that's a year older than me, hot, and probably a hell of a lot smarter than I am likes me. Well, it seems like he likes me, so I'm going to say he does. It was nice to go to Hogsmeade without embarrassing myself like in third year when I had tried to talk with a group of girls my age.

They had, to say the least, told me to get lost and go hang out with the other misfits in the castle.

Jerks.

When we made it inside the castle and to the Great Hall, a group of boys waved over at us. I'm assuming they were waving at Blake, seeing as I have no clue who the hell they were.

"Alexa, I was just wondering if you wanted to maybe study together some day this week," he asked me, his eyes sparking with hope. I stared back, confused.

He was a whole year older than me. We wouldn't be studying the same thing. When I voiced my confusion, he grinned wider. "I know, but I want to spend some time with you."

OHHHH!

I understand the error of my ways now.

"O-oh! Uhm, you mean, li-like a…date?"

He grinned again. "If that's okay with you, of course."

I stood there for a second before sense drop-kicked me and I nodded vigorously. "Sure, yeah, yes, yes, I would like to."

He laughed and leaned down, gently kissed my cheek, and ran over to his friends, waving at me happily. I stood there, shocked, before breaking into a stupid grin and practically skipping to the common room.

Metaphorically, of course; I am also physically incapable of skipping without injuring myself in some way. When I reached the Fat Lady, she appraised me with a grin.

"Well, aren't we happy today?"

Yes, we are, I almost replied, but instead I repeated the password and rushed through the portrait hole, looking around, making sure I was alone, before jumping onto the couch. Laughing, I twirled around and continued to jump.

My luck didn't last too long.

I misjudged where the edge of the couch was and my leg hit open air. Long story short, I screamed and toppled off the couch and onto the floor with a loud thud. I laid there for a moment, breathing heavily, before I finally decided to try and stand up.

Ha…bad idea.

I yelped and fell back down as I tried to put some weight on my right ankle, which, when I inspected it, was twisted at a very odd angle. With a sigh, I lifted my wand into the air, summoned my first-aid kit and waited for it to float down the stairs.

I didn't have to wait too long, like usual. Once it reached me, I popped open the cover and pulled out a murky liquid in a vial, wrinkling my nose in distaste.

Really, that broken-bone potion is pretty disgusting. It kind of tastes like that liquid medicine my mom used to make me take when I was a kid. I uncorked the vial, plugged my nose, and tipped the liquid into my mouth, swallowing it hurriedly, shaking my head to rid myself of the nasty taste.

How sad is it when you are so clumsy, you're prepared with a bone-mending potion in a first-aid kit?

I'll tell you how sad it is; very sad. Almost tragic, really.

I looked up as the portrait swung open and voices reached my ears before the people came into view. Lily stopped arguing with James to look down at my on the ground. I smiled shyly back.

"Hey…" I muttered, placing the empty bottle into my first aid kit and sending it back up into my room. Lily rushed over to me and dropped beside me.

"What did you do?"

I grinned back meekly and shrugged. "I fell; broke my ankle, I think. But I'm okay; I used the last of that bone-mending stuff you made for me."

Lily sighed and shook her head before gesturing to my feet. I pointed at the left one and she gently turned it, emitting a loud crack, which made me wince, and placing it back into its original position.

"How'd you fall?" James asked, plopping down on the couch. My face flushed a dark red and I looked down at my lap, thinking of something I could say. Lily came to rescue, thankfully.

"She lost her balance, you idiot. How else does she fall?" she snapped, successfully shutting James up. I looked up and smiled at Lily, glancing behind her to see Remus talking animatedly with a pretty black-haired girl. I looked from them to Peter and a small pudgy Hufflepuff girl who was sitting beside him at one of the wooden tables made for studying.

Huh…James wasn't lying when he said Peter got a date.

Unsurprisingly, I didn't see Sirius or Christy anywhere.

"Let me guess, Christy and Sirius are having some fun in a broom cupboard somewhere?"

James rolled his eyes and nodded while Lily snorted loudly. I smiled and drifted into comfortable conversation with the two polar opposites, laughing and joking around like we've been good friends for years and years. I hardly noticed when Sirius and Christy returned, her skirt on backwards and her face flushed while Sirius looked perfectly in order, except for his tussled hair and the light pink on his cheeks.

I noticed, but not as much as I would have before today.

I glanced back at James and Lily, only to see Lily practically sitting on the arm rest to get away from James. I laughed.

"Down boy, I don't think she's interested," I said, patting James head softly. He stared at me with large puppy dog eyes and sat down on the ground next to me, laying his head in my lap. I laughed again, a blush spreading across my face.

"Look what you did, Lily; you hurt his feelings!"

Lily rolled her eyes and gave a mock apology.

Honestly, when are these two going to realize they're made for each other? Or, rather, when is _Lily _going to realize they're made for each other?

"Lexi?"

I looked up and smiled at Alice who was walking over, grinning madly. My smile faded until I staring at her accusingly.

What the hell could she be up to?

…

…

…Nope, I got nothing. Alice isn't the plotting type.

"There's a boy outside, waiting for you. I think he said his name was Blake…" she announced. I grinned widely and gently pushed James off my lap, hopping up to my feet and rushing over to the portrait hole.

"Who's Blake?" I heard Lily ask before I walked into the corridor. My grin widened when I saw Blake standing there, fidgeting.

Aw!

"Hiya Blake! What's up?" I asked. He walked over to me and looked at me, concern etched into his face.

"Remus came down to the library a little while ago and said you broke your ankle! Are you okay? Shouldn't you be in the hospital wing?"

I laughed and waved away his worries. "Don't worry, Blake; as I have already explained, I have meetings with the floor fairly often and I was ready. I took a potion that mended my bones, so now I'm all better! See?" I picked my foot off the ground and twirled it around, trying to balance myself on one foot.

I realize _now _that it was a bad idea. I didn't know it at the time though and suddenly, I found myself pitching forward until I fell against Blake's chest for the second time that day. With an intense blush, I pulled away, grinning up at him shyly.

He smiled. "Yes, I'm starting to realize just how uncoordinated you are."

I shrugged and laughed nervously. "That's me."

"So, do you want to study on Monday?"

I looked up at him and smiled widely, nodding. "Yeah, definitely! We just can't do it on Wednesday for Friday," I told him. A crease formed between his eyebrows.

"I have detention."

Suddenly, the crease was gone and his eyebrows had risen in shock. "You?"

"Yep," I answered, popping the 'p'. Shaking his head, he leaned down and kissed my cheek again, lingering a while.

"I'm really beginning to look forward to getting to know you better, Alexa," he told me with a wink before walking back to Ravenclaw Tower. I stood there, shocked, before I turned around, muttered the password, and stumbled into the common room. Alice and Lily were there in an instant, asking me a million questions.

It took a couple of minutes before I could hope to speak properly. If I had tried to speak right away, all that would come out would probably be 'woh woh-woh woh' like on the old Charlie Brown specials.

"I have an actual date on Monday," I said, my face stretching into that now-overused grin.

Really, I've grinned more today than I have in my whole life.

"A date! Come on, we have to pick something out for you to wear," Lily exclaimed before dragging me away and up the stairs.

Despite the looming hell of outfits and make-up, I was grinning like an idiot for the rest of the night.

I'm such a dork. But that's okay; a hot guy likes me, so my dorkiness is now acceptable.

I really wasn't aware of the drama that my life would become in the next few weeks.

Sigh.

* * *

_Love. It's like lightning; you get struck once and, baby, it kills._

**-Anonymous**


	4. Notes to Detention

_Find a person who loves you for exactly who you are. Good mood._

_Bad Mood. Ugly. Pretty. Handsome. What-have-you. The right_

_person is still going to think the sun shines out of your ass. _

_That's the type of person worth sticking with _

**-J.K. Simmons, Juno**

* * *

**Four**

Notes to Detention

_Dear Diary,_

_Ok, so I realized I haven't wrote for about a month now, but I've been very busy lately. No, really, I have. Every freaking Wednesday and Friday I have detention with Slughorn (guess who doesn't?), than every Monday and Friday I have study sessions with Blake. Sometimes we actually do study, though. And on Tuesday and the weekends I spend time with Lily and Alice and the Marauders. Yep. I so told you I've been busy. Seeing as today is the first day of the end of my detentions (FREEDOM!), I decided it was time to converse with you. And, I shall repeat for you, I actually have a life now. I know, I know, I was shocked too. And yet, even though I have a life, I still write in you as if you could talk back. Looks like I'm still going insane._

_Finally getting on with my life,_

_Alexa Embers_

**:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:**

I was sitting on the couch, squished rather painfully between Remus and James when it happened. Lily and Alice were off scampering around, probably talking with their boyfriends, Frank and Daniel.

I tried not to mention that little fact to James; he gets rather moody when you mention Lily's new beau. His infatuation with her really is getting annoying, let me tell you. But that's a complaint for another day; right now, something major is happening.

Ok, so the three of us were just sitting there, the two of them trying to squeeze me to smithereens for some random comment I had made when Christy came storming in, a casual and calm Sirius following after.

I bet you already see where this is going, don't you?

Ha. Too bad, I'm going to explain anyway.

"I can't believe you, Sirius!" Christy screeched, throwing her hands in the air before resting them on her hips. Her eyes narrowed dangerously when Sirius regarded her in boredom.

"I don't see what you're raving about, actually," he said. He stuffed his hands into the pockets of his breeches and spared a glance in our direction. Now, I will admit, I still have a crush on him, but it's not as strong as before, now that I have Blake. So, let's just keep that little detail in mind, shall we?

Your correct answer should be: Yes, we shall.

"What the hell do you _think _I'm raving about? It isn't about the sex, that's for sure!"

Yes, Christy has never been the sharpest tool in the shed. She _could've _said something much more witty, like 'It isn't the food' or 'it isn't the service' but no. She goes for the comment that will only boost Sirius's already impossibly large ego.

Sigh. Now, she's a _moronic _wench.

"It was just kissing, Christine. Don't get your knickers in a bunch," Sirius retorted coolly. I blinked and gaped at him.

He actually cheated on her! I would think he'd at least have the decency to break up with her before moving onto his next victim, but no! Obviously, I overestimated his character.

I know, I know; I must sound like a hypocrite right now. I don't like, nor have I ever like, Christy, but still; nobody deserves to be cheated on even if they are evil wenches.

"Just kissing? You were practically having dry sex with her!" Christy shrieked. I flushed a deep red color and looked down at my book. That was not a comment I needed to hear.

My virgin ears!

"Honestly! You're overreacting, Christy."

I rolled my eyes in annoyance at his comment, pretending to read about how to transfigure a cat into a plate. Unfortunately, their conversation was just too interesting.

Christy laughed mirthlessly and when I glanced up, I saw her roll her eyes sarcastically, the orbs shining with unshed tears. I absentmindedly wondered how long she could hold out on the tough girl act.

"At least now I see what you're really like; you manipulate someone until you get what you want," Christy spat at him angrily. He remained unfazed, staring at her with a raised eyebrow.

I wonder what someone has to say to get through that carefully composed mask of his.

I didn't have to wonder for too long.

"You're just like that Lestrange girl."

James and Remus were up and over at Sirius's side in a flash while I sat there, staring at Christy, my mouth hanging open.

Holy shit! Pardon my French, even though that's not French.

She really _is _a moron. I chanced a look at Sirius and frowned slightly; his eyes were narrowed and danced with anger, but he hadn't moved an inch towards his wand. His fist were clenched so hard, the knuckles were white. I wonder why he didn't try to jinx Christy. Or, you know, damage her in some way? Maybe do some kind of painful, permanent damage to her womanly areas?

Gah!

. . .I can already feel the pain, like when you hear about someone giving birth and all that? Yeah. Ow.

I tossed my book to the other side of the couch and walked over to Christy, who was glaring spitefully at Sirius. I touched her arm. "Uh…Christy? Why don't you go upstairs and I'll…um…I'll go search for Lily or Alice or…the other girl that shares a room with us?" I suggested, my face scrunching up when I tried to think of my last roommate. What is her _name_? I can picture a face, but no name!

How odd. Christy turned to me, giving me an 'are-you-stupid?' look. "You mean Mary?"

I snapped my fingers and grinned. "That's it! Yeah, I'll go look for her."

She snorted. "If you can't remember her name, how do you plan on knowing what she looks like, Alexa? Honestly, sometimes you can be such a moron."

My mouth hung there for a second before I snapped it shut and glared at her, pulling out my wand slowly and discreetly. "First; I remember faces, not names. Second; who the hell are you calling a moron, you plastic Barbie Doll? Third; you better get a safe distance from me because, unlike Black, I will not hesitate to jinx you so many times Madam Pomfrey won't know how to cure you!"

She eyed me doubtfully, so I held my wand at eye level, raising a brow.

I really am sick of her and a good dose of cursing will do my sanity some good. Unfortunately, she must have something working in that head of hers, because I saw a flash of fear in her eyes before she stalked off to the dormitories. I huffed and walked over to the couch, grabbing my book, grumbling the whole way.

Who does that evil wench think she is, talking like she's this perfect witch everyone should look up to?

E-VIL WEN-CH!

Wait…E-VIL BIT-CHY WEN-CH!

Hah.

I only stopped gathering my things when I heard my name. "Uh, Lexi? Where're you going?"

I look over at James. "Well, I sure as hell am not going up there. I just got done with my detentions for getting into a fight with Bellatrix, thank you; I do not need more detentions for fighting a housemate. Besides, I'm meeting Blake in the library today."

Remus gave me a teasing smile. "How much studying are you actually planning on getting done tonight?"

I scowled. "Bleh," I snapped before marching over to the portrait hole.

I am so uncoordinated; it should really be a federal offense. I'm a danger to all things walking, really, I am.

That damn chair was out in the open again, so, naturally, I tripped over it. I stumbled a few times before I managed to regain my balance. Once I did, I muttered, "Damn chair, always in my damn way every damn day."

I heard stifled laughter from the boys but I just continued walking, pointing a jelly-leg curse at James and Remus before disappearing into the corridor.

Snort. I bet that's going to be amusing; the Marauders just got jinxed! HA!

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"Hullo Lexi! You're early today," Blake observed, his mouth spreading into a large smile. Somehow, I don't think he minded me being early too much. I smiled and sat down, pulling out my Charms book out of my battered bag, popping it open to chapter eleven.

"Yeah, I know. Sorry," I apologized, shrugging. He leaned over, moving his chair closer while turning my head to face him.

"Don't be; I'm not," he said before laying his lips on mine.

Well, I suppose we aren't getting much studying done tonight. Too bad; I have a test tomorrow.

But, hey, I'm not complaining!

I closed my eyes and kissed him back willingly.

And I, being the undeniable romantic that I am, kinda got lost in the whole moment. You know, as much as one can get lost in a moment that's set in a library. And, like in all real life situations, my lungs began to beat painfully, needing air.

I broke away from Blake, breathing deeply while blinking rapidly, a bit dazed. He really was a good kisser, quite honestly. Then again, I don't exactly have anyone to compare him to, so he could be the worst kisser in the whole world.

But really, how does one judge other one's kissing? By how much they pucker their lips? What if they have some weird lip-muscle disorder? Would that be taken into account?

It's really very confusing. So, I'll just stick with my earlier statement: Blake really is a good kisser.

"I really need to study," I muttered, frowning. Why did Flitwick have to choose tomorrow to have a test? It could've been on any other day, really, but no; it had to be tomorrow. Blake nodded in understanding and pulled out a roll of parchment and his potions book along with one of those new quills with the ink built in.

I had almost bought one at Diagon Alley this year, but I had heard there were a few glitches they had yet to work out. Who are they you may ask? Why, the unknown people who made the quills, of course!

Honestly! Do you ever hear about the actual people who make pens or pencils or quills? No, you don't. Never: not in the _Prophet_, or _People Magazine,_ or anywhere else. You just never hear about them. I find that rather odd. I mean, you hear all about the maker of the floo network and all that rot, but never about the person who created the quill.

Sigh. I need to concentrate on my homework. It's times like this when I really hate my short-attention span; it never lets me finish my work. Well, I mean, it eventually does or else I wouldn't have the grades I do, but still; it usually takes a good half-hour before I run out of things to distract myself. Really, there are so—

Gah! Stop!

I. Must. Concentrate…Now.

…

…

…

Alright, this is _not _working; at all.

Sigh.

Is it just me or do I use words to convey actions a lot? I never try to make the 'whoosh' sound of a sigh. I just simply write: Sigh.

I do that with snort too. Is that as odd as I think it is? Or am I just distracting myself from doing my homework? Eh…probably the latter.

With a sharp exhale, I snapped my book shut. "Ok, well, I can't concentrate. I'm just gonna go back to the common room, alright?"

Blake frowned momentarily, but he soon smiled and gave me a short kiss on the lips before turning his attention back to his book, not even saying a friendly 'goodbye' when I left. I frowned.

What is it with him? He's been like that the last couple of times I've seen him; all…secretive and…secret-like. I really couldn't think of another word.

A thought struck me for a minute before it was quickly discarded to the deepest recesses of my mind: what if, what James had said, was true? What if Blake really was a 'wanna-be' playboy? Does that mean that he's beginning to think I'm hardly worth the effort?

…But, as I said, those thoughts were _quickly _discarded. Very quickly; so quickly, in fact, I don't even remember doing it. It was just a FLASH and the thoughts were…um…gone?

Pathetic lying, I know; I never was very good at that.

"Lexi! Did you hear what Black did?"

I blinked and looked to my right, watching as Lily's face contorted around his last name. I frowned. "You mean snogging some other girl while he was dating Christy?"

Lily did a double take. "You…know?"

"Of course I know! I was there when it all went down," I said, irate. I saw Lily's eyes widen, and, after revising my statement in my head, I quickly corrected myself. "I mean the break-up! Not the actual crime! Sheesh Lily."

Her eyes reverted back to normal size and she shook her head. "I can't believe he did that! It's like he thinks of women as…as toys you just…throw away when you get bored!"

"Or you get a new toy," I added sourly. Lily nodded and, thinking of Christy's earlier accusation, I sighed.

"Well, to be fair, she did say something rather out-of-line to Sirius."

Lily gave me a look. I shook my head. "No, really; she did! She said Sirius was exactly like Bellatrix. Now, honestly, he isn't anything like any of his family. Yes, he is a bit of a…womanizer, for lack of a better word, but he doesn't torture people for fun."

Lily mulled this over as we continued on our way to the common room. I shifted through my bag, making sure everything was there unnecessarily. I knew everything was there; I just needed to do something with my hands. I didn't notice we were on the staircase heading towards the portrait until I stepped into the seventh step and shrieked.

I forgot about that little rough spot; my leg sank downwards while my other one stuck out at an uncomfortable angle the lower I got. "Ack! Lily!"

She was, obviously, trying not to laugh at my distress.

Touché; I suppose I kinda deserve it, considering the amount of laughter I had used when she tried to fit into that children's dress. I still giggled when I thought of it.

"Yes, okay, it's so hilarious when Alexa gets stuck in this stupid step; now, help me!" I cried, flailing my arms. Lily snorted and bent down, grabbing both my arms and pulling upwards, releasing my leg from its imprisonment. I sighed, relieved, and patted my leg reassuringly.

There, there; it's all better now.

We ascended the rest of the staircase, Lily walking and me limping, until we were inside the common room (after reciting the password, of course!). When she saw the Marauders huddled on the couch by the fire, she rolled her eyes, stuck her nose in the air, and left, ignoring the offer for a date thrown at her by an ever-persistent James. I sat down in a cushy armchair, watching interestedly as James slumped into a mild-depression.

"I don't think you're making any progress with her, James," Peter piped up. I blinked.

Ah, so he does talk!

"You know, Peter, I don't think I've ever heard you talk before," I commented lightly, smiling at him. He bowed his head and stuttered, which amused me greatly; I tried not to show it though while I pulled out my Charms book for the second time that night. Unfortunately, Sirius must've caught my slight smile, 'cause he grinned at me knowingly.

I just tried to control my blush.

"Why are you reading your Charms book?" James asked after a few minutes. I glanced over the cover of the book and raised a brow, but Remus answered for me.

"We have a test tomorrow."

Sirius shrugged. "That test is going to be simple, mate. James and I aren't even studying."

I bit back a snort. "Oh? Confident, are you?"

He turned to me and flashed that grin. I stayed composed…well, outwardly, anyways; I can't control my heartbeat or what little pieces of sanity I have left. "Why, yes, I am!"

"More like arrogant, actually."

He raised an eyebrow at me. "According to you."

"According to most of the student, and some faculty, population," I corrected sharply. He narrowed his eyes while the others watched us interestedly. I rather liked having Sirius Black's undivided attention; it sent a thrill up my spine.

"Why don't you go and help Chris with her homework instead of bugging us?" he suggested lightly. James choked and whacked Sirius with a pillow.

"Do not involve me!" he exclaimed. Sirius rolled his eyes and corrected him self.

"Me; go help her and stop bugging me."

I snorted. "Please; I am not going to work on that helpless case. Lily can knock herself out. Besides, I'm not a big fan of Malibu Barbie."

James snickered. "We know; we saw. I was honestly waiting for you to hex her."

"I was sorely tempted. But, see, I can understand where she's coming from. I don't think she had any right in any way to say what she did," I added hurriedly, noticing the anger flare in Sirius's eyes. He calmed down some and I continued. "But, quite frankly, whether it be snogging or shagging another girl, I would be pretty pissed off at catching my boyfriend in the act. Either way, it's something you should be doing with your _girlfriend _and not some other girl. Honestly, it's horribly pathetic and absolutely disgusting; you should've at least had the decency to break up with her first."

Sirius rolled his eyes. "You sound like my dear old mum; be decent and all that rot."

I glared at him viciously and stood up, placing my book back into my bag. "There's your problem, right there! You think, because of the type of people you grew up with, that _decency _and _honor _is about not associating with people like me. But, the fact is, those two traits are about treating other human beings, whether they be muggle or muggle-born or half-blood or whatever, as such; as _human beings_! Not objects, as you are so famously known for doing."

I took a deep breath after my rant and raised a brow at Sirius, daring him to contradict me. But he was just sitting there, looking absolutely shocked. I rolled my eyes, hid the thought that he looked absolutely amazing sitting there, and turned to James. "I'm going to my dormitory. Yes, I'll try to convince Lily of your good traits instead of the many bad ones."

He smiled widely and settled back into the cushions of the couch; he's so predictable. I'm not even sure he noticed the insult there.

And, as usual, Lily didn't listen to my persuasions. Of course, I kind of suck at that kinda stuff; I'm not good at forcing others to see my way.

Ah! My bed!

I jumped on the cozy mattress, pulled my drapes around the bed, and snuggled under my blankets happily, not even bothering to change my clothes.

It's not as if I don't have other clothes.

Now I just have an extra pair of PJs.

**X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X**

"When I see all the papers turned over, I'll collect the tests," Flitwick announced, flicking his wand and sending each of us a sheet of parchment with the test questions. I yawned widely and dipped my quill, scrawling my name at the top. Glancing down the sheet, I noticed there were twelve questions and three practical spells.

I yawned again and stretched my arms before hunching over my table, reading the first question.

_'Which charm can reveal anything that's hidden by magical means?_

_A. Specialis Revelio_

_B. Scarpin's Revelaspell_

_C. Stealth Sensoring Charms_

_D. None of the above'_

I frowned and crossed off choices C and D. I thought for a second.

I read somewhere that Scarpin's Revelaspell works a lot like Specialis Revelio, only it distinguishes the ingredients in a potion.

Ah! There's my answer! This is charms, not potions. I marked choice A and quickly continued on, grinning triumphantly. The rest of the test continued in such a fashion until I finished and flipped over my paper, putting my quill down beside it.

And, than, for the third time that morning, I yawned.

Hm…I think, instead of not getting enough sleep, I got too much. You know, when you sleep like, twelve hours, than when you wake up, your brain is exceedingly sluggish? Yep, that's happening with me. Right. Now.

With a slight shock, I realized I haven't been self-pitying in quite a few weeks. Hn. I do believe, ladies and gents, that that's a sign of progress! Yay!

It looks like my impending insanity has been pushed back a few steps.

I glanced around the classroom in boredom, watching as nearly everyone continued to scratch their quills on the parchment, some looking flustered (ahem…Peter) and others looking too tired to actually think about the questions (my fourth roommate who I've learned is called 'Mary'). I tapped my fingers on the desk.

Tap. Tap-tap. Tap.

Tap. Tap-tap-tap. Tap.

Tap. Tap-tap-tap-tap. Tap.

Tap. Ta—

Whoops. Lily just shot me a rather terrifying glare. I think it's time to stop the insistent tapping, despite my obvious boredom.

That's what sucks about finishing before everyone else; I never have anything else to do. Well, you know, anything that doesn't either A) annoy anyone or B) cause anyone bodily harm.

I've already done A. I've yet to do B.

Sigh.

I frowned slightly, recalling this morning when Blake pretty much ignored me in the Great Hall. Seriously; he just…ignored me. I tried to be nice and wave, but he didn't even spare me a single glance. Rude, much?

That irritating little thought from the library came floating back to the front of my mind. I guess I can see him being a playboy; he's gorgeous enough.

Well, you know, not nearly as gorgeous as Sirius, but hey; I'll take what I can get.

That sounded awfully shallow. I apologize.

I picked up my quill and tapped the feather against my chin, thinking about my owl, Mina. I haven't visited her yet and she'll probably be put out with me because of that. I thought about later today and, pleased, I realized I didn't have any engagements.

Well, now I do.

I'll go see Mina, maybe bring her some treats, which I will probably snatch from James. Not like he'll notice.

I sighed and turned my gaze to the table, blinking when I saw a piece of parchment folded into the shape of a swan. Carefully, cautiously, I unraveled it and raised a brow at the unfamiliar scrawl.

My eyes scanned the words and I blushed. No. Freaking. Way.

Just to be sure I wasn't seeing things, I reread the note.

**'Alexa: that's a lovely name, really** (such a cheesy line)**.** **Of course, someone who looks as beautiful** (liar) **as you do should have a beautiful name. And of course, you have plenty of refreshing spunk that, I bet, goes past dueling** (I think I began to hyperventilate at this point)**.** **And, as I'm sure you'll be happy to know, I've realized that Christy isn't my type; I think the quieter girls are more of my cup of tea** (uh-huh; I'm sure, lover-boy)**.I was wondering; love, if you would allow me the honor to take you to the next Hogsmeade visit** (snort. 'Allow me the honor?' He sure is laying it on thick)**.** **–Sirius'**

Yep, that note is _definitely _real.

Of course, I did find things wrong with the letter (the cheesy line, the two LIES, the charm) but still…I couldn't help but feel excited. I mean, he actually noticed _me!_ Shy, meek, little me!

Eek!!!

And, as always, after this immense happiness, an overwhelming sense of disappointment hit me. I couldn't go anywhere with him that might give others the impression that we're dating. First of all, I'm utterly lost with the whole situation dealing with Blake. I don't know if we are (or ever were, really) dating or if we were just…you know, friends…with benefits? Second, I knew what he did to Christy! I mean, I can't just ignore that!

Can I?

…

…

…

No! Of course I can't! A small relapse in strength, sorry; my hormones have a mind of their own sometimes.

And, third; he'll do the same thing to me. We'll be dating for a few days (and I would probably lose my innocence somewhere in there. I mean, come on; he's Sirius Black! If anyone get a woman to give her virginity willingly, it's probably him) and I'll think it's going great! Then he dumps me like a ragged doll and move on to the next shiny new toy. And I'll become of 'those girls.' You know, the ones who date the playboys, say that 'Oh, no, he's changed; he _loves _me!' and than cry for days on end after the break-up.

Bleh; those bimbos really annoy me. I mean, really, how can you not catch on? Boys will say **anything **to get in our pants.

'Cause we're just so irresistible!

Or, well, you know, the pretty girls are; girls like me are just the…innocent little bystanders wishing they were the pretty girls that are so irresistible.

I was shaken from my thoughts when Lily attempted to steal my note. Flustered, I pulled it away, dipped my quill in the ink bottle, and wrote my response carefully.

_'Sirius: such a contradiction to your actual personality. Yeah, well, as amazing as your offer is, I'm afraid I'm going to have to respond with a No. I'm already dating someone…well, kinda. Either way, I'm not available to you. And, no heartbreaking offence meant, I don't feel like becoming just another girl you can shag. Sorry. But why don't you ask Mary, who is apparently my other roommate? I'll bet she's fun. And I know if anyone can see the _

_second meaning there, it's you, love. And I resent your little crack about my spunk! –Alexa'_

I frowned at the last line.

Does that sound flirty? …Eh, whatever; I think I got my upsetting point across. With a wistful sigh, I waved my wand and the paper folded into a swan, which flew dutifully over to James and Sirius's table, which was, surprisingly, two desks ahead of me and Lily.

How did I miss this? Maybe I'm not as obsessed with Black as I thought?

…Snort. Yeah, right.

Lily jabbed me in the side. "What the hell was that about?"

I shrugged. "Sirius Black tried to pick me up with a note," I whispered, smiling suddenly at the humor. Honestly, who in their right mind try's to get a girl…_through a note?_ I mean anyone _over _the age of ten? "Ha. You know, if you think about it, it's pretty funny."

Lily stared at me before turning her head away, trying to hide the smile threatening to spread across her face. I poked her cheek teasingly.

"Aw, you wanna smile! You know it's amusing, admit it!" I encouraged. Grudgingly, she began to snicker. I, of course, joined in.

Isn't it nice how we can share such a moment with friends; even if it_ is _at the expense of someone else?

…humph…It sounds better when you're actually a part of the laughter.

"Mr. Black, are you cheating?" Professor Flitwick squeaked. I raised a brow and leaned into the aisle-way between desks, trying to catch a glimpse of Black. When I did get a glance and I saw what he was reading, I blanched and sunk back into my chair.

Oh no oh no oh no!

"No, of course not, Professor!" Sirius replied, feigning shock. I watched as Flitwick hopped off his pile of books and waddled over to Sirius, holding out his hand. I covered my face.

Merlin…take me now! Kill me, please!

In horror, I witnessed Sirius hand over the note willingly and Flitwick read over the already unfolded paper. He looked up from the paper and directly at me.

Oh, how I wish the floor could just pull me down and away from everyone!

My face burst into a flaming red as I tired to sink lower in my chair. The Marauders were OF COURSE, staring at me, so everybodyhad to follow their example and stare at me too! I mean, come on; could they be anymore brainless?

THINK FOR YOURSELVES, MY PEERS!

…Oh ok, I didn't say that out loud. Whew. For second there, I was afraid I had shouted it.

But I didn't. So, it's all good.

Well…okay, that was a lie.

It's a tiny, teensy, weensy, _itty-bit _better. But it is far from good. I just got caught passing a note with Sirius Black.

There is nothing good about this situation.

Nothing, I tell you; nothing.

And, somehow, I knew the words before Flitwick spoke them:

"Two weeks detention, Mr. Black and Ms. Embers starting tonight in my office."

Well…shit. I guess I'm not visiting Mina tonight.

Fan-bloody-tastic.

**/0\0/0\0/0\0/0\**

"Good luck with Black," Lily called as I exited the common room at 6:15 p.m. I grumbled and walked down the staircase, my arms crossed tightly and my face contorted into a scowl.

Sirius Black is a freaking arse.

I mean, he could've erased the writing on the note. Or burned it. Or ate it! But no, he decides to hand it over oh so willingly and land me detention! Stupid gorgeous bastard.

The walk to Professor Flitwick's office was short and sweet; I didn't run into anybody worth mentioning, there were no clumsy trips, and Peeves was nowhere to be found, which is odd. He's usually cackling and floating and making up those weird little rhymes of his.

I think the Bloody Baron got to him, quite personally; he's the scariest ghost in the castle, being all covered in guts and blood and all that rot. Blech.

I guess there was no such thing as hygiene way back then. Of course, it was said that he killed himself just after whatever bloody act he committed, so I guess he never got the chance to clean up…eh.

"Ms. Embers! You're here!" Flitwick squeaked when I opened the door. I nodded and sat down in a chair farthest away from Black, which is, sadly, only about five feet away. You know, it figures; when I was practically obsessing over him, the Fates made sure he had no clue who I was and I never sat within ten feet of him; now that I'm pissed off, I have his complete attention (which is a bit unnerving at the moment) and I'm sitting extremely close to him.

This is injustice if I've ever seen it!

Which, I have; quite a bit of it, too. And not only in my life! How reassuring is that?

Well, I mean, it's not reassuring to the other poor soul with injustice going on…but for me it is. I know, I know, it sounds selfish. Ok, it is selfish; but, really, can you blame me? The Fates and some Higher Power (God, in my personal beliefs, but to someone else, it might be Buddha, so yeah) is undeniably pissed off at something I've done or did. If I get cut a break every once in a while, I think I have a bit of a right to be happy.

Whew…long rant. Wonder how much time that killed?

…two minutes.

How lovely.

"…and polish the silver! I'll see you two in an hour's time, alright?" I blinked and watched as Flitwick left, closing the door behind him.

. . .

. . .

Oh…no…GAH! I'm alone with Black…in an office…faaaar away from any decent civilization, like the common rooms! Well, the Slytherin dungeons are just below, but I said _decent._

I think it's safe to say that the Slytherins aren't decent in any use of the word.

"You weren't even paying attention, were you, love?"

I blinked again and turned to Sirius, trying to clear my head. He was grinning at me, his head cocked to the side and his arms draped over the armrests of the chair elegantly. Sometimes it's hard to realize he's a Black; sometimes it's not.

This time, it wasn't. He had the grace of every other Black member.

"No, not really; am I to expect you did?" I snapped after a minute of garbled thinking. Something was bugging me a bit, something he said in the sentence, but my brain was still trying to get out of my random thoughts and into the real world, so I couldn't really find out what was bugging me.

He stood up. "Well, you don't have to expect anything," he responded, walking towards me. I swallowed, pretty loudly, I think.

Wait! I'm pissed off at him!

"But, please, don't let me interrupt your expectations."

Ah…

No, no stop! Stop responding!

I felt the heat flood in my cheeks (the face ones, thank you) as he placed a hand on each of my armrests and leaned forward. My eyes drifted subconsciously to his lips and I licked my own, which got suddenly dry.

STOOOOOP IT!

MY TRAITOROUS BODY! STOP. REACTING!

Wait…did he call me 'love'?

My anger flared back and I picked a hand off my lap and pressed it against his chest, pushing him away. "What did you call me?"

He frowned and, despite my efforts, leaned forward.

Really, I must be awfully weak; I was trying with _all my freaking power _to push him away and he brushed me aside like I was some kind of bug. Stupid, arrogant, cocky—

Oh dear Merlin…He pressed his cheek to mine and kissed the hollow space beneath my ear.

"I called you love, of course," he whispered, prying my legs apart gently with his knee. I narrowed my eyes and, using both hands this time, managed to push him away. I stood up and, after putting a decent amount of space between us, glared at him.

"And who the bloody hell said you could call me that?" I demanded. _No one, that's who, _I mentally shrieked. I will admit that, with the female population (myself included), Sirius Black could probably get away with murder and still get shagged continually (myself not included).

But I'm a romantic at heart and have quite a bit of dignity; no man, unless they're my husband or boyfriend or lover or, you know, all three, can call me 'love.' It's much too intimate.

Black is in dangerous territory, even though my mind was still in hysterics at his contact. So was my body, but that's rather obvious.

He blinked and rolled his eyes, running a hand through his hair. I had a brief moment of weakness and imagined myself running my fingers through it.

Don't judge me! It was BRIEF!

Okay, it wasn't, but I pushed it away for the time being.

"You know, most girls are flattered when they get called 'love,'" Sirius muttered. I scoffed and crossed my arms.

"Yes, well, I think it's safe to say this: I am not most girls. Sorry, dear, but nobody calls me love unless, you know, they're involved with me in some way," I replied curtly.

He has such quick mood changes!

Maybe he's Bi-Polar?

Wait…can wizards_ have_ Bi-Polar?

Hm…

ANYWAY…His expression quickly changed from annoyed to…well, it looked kinda playful and…hungry? Eh, I'm not analyzing it; too much work.

"What if I said I wanted to be involved with you?" he purred. I scoffed, again, ignoring the way my heart picked up the pace and my face changed from white to red.

"What if I said I'm not interested?"

He just rolled his eyes, changing his mood, again. "Everyone is interested."

My violet eyes narrowed dangerously. "Once again, I'm not everyone. Quite frankly, Mister Black, I have no desire to become one of your fuck buddies, for lack of a better term."

His mouth dropped for a split second before closing with a snap; probably his teeth crashing together.

"Is that what you think my girlfriends are? 'Fuck Buddies'?" he demanded, seething. I sighed sharply.

"Ok, that was harsh, sorry. But they can't honestly be called your 'girlfriends' either—" I held up a finger, silencing his protest "—you can't date a girl for, I don't know, a week, break up, than go and date another girl and so on and so forth, and call them your girlfriends. Sorry, Black; it doesn't work that way. Those girls are more like…err…friends with benefits."

I frowned at the poor name. Really. I couldn't come up with anything more creative?

Apparently not, seeing as that's what I told him. 'Friends with benefits,' blech.

He scowled at me, but I just turned my back to him and scoured the office, looking for the polishing supplies. They were on the Professor's desk, so I twisted around the obstacles and grabbed the bottle and rag, than turned to the silver settled beneath a heavy-looking piece of glass.

Using my wand, I lifted the cover into the air and placed it on the floor before starting on the polishing; Black can do whatever else I missed.

The rest of our detention was a quiet affair; I wasn't pissed off anymore, but I could tell by the anger rolling off him like cologne that he was.

"Marvelous! Thank you, Ms. Embers and Mr. Black! Now, I'll see you on Friday, next Monday, and also next Friday to finish your detentions," Flitwick explained when he returned. I nodded, smiled tightly, and left the office like a bat out of Hell. The hallways were, unsurprisingly, empty, so I took advantage of this; I speed walked to the common room. Unfortunately, while I was doing this, my brain forgot to remember the tricky seventh step on the staircase.

And, as a result, I fell through with a yelp. "Oh, bloody hell!"

I struggled, trying to pull myself out, for about ten minutes before giving up entirely and sitting there, one leg through the hole, the other bent, my arms crossed, and my face in a pout.

How stupid am I? I've fallen through this damn hole a thousand times before and I still forget unless someone pulls be up and away from it!

"Damn step, damn memory, damn lack of humans, damn it all," I muttered angrily, trying to pull my leg through, yet again. It, of course, didn't work in the least. It only resulted in my leg aching and my mood turning from pouty to sour.

This could not get any worse.

"You fell through?"

Sigh.

I hate that phrase; it can't get any worse! I should know better than to use it. It's a taboo for worse things.

"Hello Sirius," I grumbled. There was silence for a minute, than he chuckled and walked around me. I looked up when he stopped in front of me and pouted. "Are you just going to look on or help me out? If you aren't going to do the latter, can you please get someone who will?"

He kneeled so that he was eye-level with me. I gulped quietly.

So close…

"That depends. You see, I'm going to be awfully lonely on the next Hogsmeade weekend—"

"Nah-uh, you got Christy," I contradicted. Why did this little detail not make itself present before? I had totally forgotten they were dating!

"—and I would love some company," he continued as if I didn't say anything. I huffed.

"Ask James."

"_Female _company."

"Damn," I sighed, dropping my head. I took a deep breath and snapped it back up, staring at him evenly.

"I don't cheat, sorry. Christy is my…ehh…roommate and I can't do that to her."

He laughed at my hesitation. Stupid, cocky, arrogant, gorgeous, graceful bastard.

It's not my fault Christy can't be considered an actual friend. Well, okay, yeah, it is.

"What if I told you I was planning on breaking up with her tomorrow?"

"Than I'd say I don't want to the rebound. Really, you need to think outside the box if you want me to agree," I teased. He scowled playfully.

When did we start teasing and being playful? Huh.

New development!

Wait, I'm supposed to be mad at him…for…loving…someone else?

No…no, I don't think that's it…maybe it was for not loving me?

Eh, it had something to do with love.

He looked down at me dubiously. "I don't believe you're in any position to make a deal with me, Alexa."

I pouted. "Alright, alright, how about this? After the Quidditch Match on Thursday, we can hang out at the celebration party, alright? That's the final deal I'm making."

He thought about this for a second and, rather abruptly, grasping my arms and pulled me up swiftly. I yelped and tumbled a bit, ramming into his chest. Flushing deeply, I pulled away, only to notice the hand on my back. Sirius leaned in, again, and kissed my cheek softly.

I stood there, blushing, blinking, and trying to calm my frantic heart before I went into cardiac arrest.

"It's a deal," he whispered. Then he pulled away and looked at me with amusement.

Being beyond the capability to speak, I gave him a confused look. He got my message.

"And how do you know, my dear, that we'll win?"

I raised a brow and cleared my throat. "A-are you insinuating that y-you're not confident in your abilities as a b-beater?"

My face turned a deeper red at my stuttering. He smirked.

"Not at all, just shocked that _you _seem confident," he replied as we walked up to the Portrait of the Fat Lady. I grinned shyly.

"It's only Ravenclaw; not much of a competition, really," I replied airily.

I congratulated myself internally for not stuttering. He threw his head back and laughed, which made my smile grow as I recited the password for the Fat Lady, who was watching us with interest. I ignored her looks and walked into the common room, stepping over a bag and pile of books.

Well, ok, I missed the pile of books.

My toe hit something hard unexpectedly and I shot forward, tumbling to the ground. My eyes snapped closed just before I smacked into the floor, grunting.

"Ouch…" I mumbled, laying there for a second.

"Alexa? Alexa, you okay?"

I blinked and left my eyes open, staring at a startled Sirius. I groaned, but placed my palms on the ground, pushing myself up. I didn't have to do too much; he grabbed me around the waist and pulled me up, cautiously putting me back on my feet. I looked down at the heels of my hands and winced; they were scraped. I'm not sure how the hell I managed that, seeing as I wasn't trying to stop my fall.

Whatever; I stopped investigating my injuries when I was, like, four.

"Alexa?"

I realized I hadn't answered Sirius's question.

"Oh, yeah, I'm fine; that happens all the time. Nothing to worry about, nope, nothing," I rambled, embarrassed. Of course I fall, just when we were actually getting along.

Gah. Stupid Fates.

Sirius stared at me, probably making sure I wasn't lying (not really necessary; I can't lie well), than his face split into a mischievous grin. "Looks like I have a damsel in distress in my life."

I flushed and scowled, stomping away. "I am not a damsel in distress, you prat!"

I heard his laughter even from the safe confides of the dormitory.

Siiigh.

This was going to be a very long, very promising, very embarrassing, and more likely than not, very amusing week.

I curled under my covers after changing into my pajamas and sighed.

Today was finally over.

I groaned when I realized that tomorrow was just going to bring more horrors.

Like an emotional Christy; Sirius is breaking up with her AND she's on her period.

Joy to the world!

. . .

Damn it all.

* * *

_Romeo, save me, I've been feeling so alone_

**-Love Song, Taylor Swift**


End file.
